this post was submitted on 22 Oct 2024
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chapotraphouse

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (3 children)

McDonald's will make you dead

They serve Big Macs

They serve Quarter-Pounders

They will put E. coli on you

Rock over London

Rock on Chicago

Covid-19, the Boomer Remover

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago

Man, he was so fucking rad. Haven't thought about WW in years.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

It's "rock over London". get it right or pay the price

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

get it right or pay the price

Is that a reference to "Salute Your Shorts?" Asking as an old. meemaw

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

Yes lol

I guess that makes me an old too

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Done. 07

The lyric sheet I copy-pasted from fucking lied. angery

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

We need a Wesley Willis emoji

[–] [email protected] 27 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

they lived by their freedom, and they died by their freedom. god mcbless them

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 weeks ago

god mcbless them

Trumpet fanfare followed by a 100 gun salute

[–] [email protected] 26 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm so ready for the conspiracy theory about how the Dems did this to attempt to merc Trump.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago

My thoughts exactly

[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

I'd like to see McDonald's wriggle itself out of this one

[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

they'll hire country music artists and late night talk show hosts to mock the victims like they did with the coffee case

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

They’re bringing back the real dollar menu

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago

Wow now I can get E. Coli for just $1!

[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Killed by eating a McDonald's burger is way more embarrassing on your obituary than autoerotic asphyxiation.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago

I don't know about that.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

McDonald's Quarter Pounder hamburgers are making people sick, with most illnesses in Colorado and Nebraska.

Of course libs are gleefully making Trump jokes.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago

I hope there's some funny parody in Napa Valley wine casks, waiting to be unleashed during the next cave visit.

libbing-out 🍷clink🍷maybe-later-honey

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Goddamnit. I ate one of those like a week ago

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

You're probably fine? I'm no doctor but I think you'd be sick by now. I thought about getting a borgor the other day myself, I won't now.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

what's wild is listeria can take up to a month to do it's thing. it slowly grows, i guess colonizes, your gut until it basically just punches tiny microscopic holes in it

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago

Oh no, oh shit I didn't know that, fuck.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago

1000036867

I think I'm good. I never get onions on mine

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

"Listeria, Imma let you finish..."

kelly

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago

I'm old. I have a license to tell dad jokes.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago

This is why I only eat the little cheeseburgers.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago

Killed by mcdonands borger, damn...

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 weeks ago

If i died from a Mcdonalds quarter pounder i would be so embarrassed. Id be talking to the other ghosts like haha howd i die??? hit by a car!! i know crazy right?? What did you say? No that rumor isnt true idk who started that. How would that even happen?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

sinclair "Welcome to the Jungle! We got scum and germs!"

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago

Welcome to the jungle - we take it day by day
If you want it - you're gonna vomit but it's the price you pay
And you're a very hungry guy - who's very easy pleased
You can taste the Micky Ds - but you won't get there for free

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 weeks ago

Trump didn't wash his hands.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

They let Trump be a fry cook for one day... feast

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (3 children)

It is not yet known which specific food ingredient is contaminated.

Now the question is, is the bacteria in the beef, vegetables or the cheese? I don't eat much fast food, which ingredients are unique to the quarter pounder when compared to other McDonald's burgers?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 weeks ago

It's always always always romaine lettuce. I don't know if there's any in any part of a McDonald's burger but I know romaine is at fault somehow

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago

which ingredients are unique

I'm going to sound like I'm joking - but I'm not. You could check Reddit. I bet there are at least 3 (far more?) threads where redditors are doing food inspector cosplay sleuthing. They love that shit and the site has a gigantic number of users. My wild hunch and wild assumption is that certain patties are only for Quarter Pounders. If my assumption is all wrong - I'm all wrong too.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago

They're claiming onions.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago

Are trump voters even more likely to eat McDonald's? Given the median voter income, I imagine it would be non-voters

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago

This is a DEM conspiracy.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago

BDS actually stands for Bypassing Digestive Syndromes.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago

How long before a republican eats one of these disease ridden cholesterol bombs on stage to signal their commitment to freedom (to die from preventable diseases)