We met on a dating app and have had five dates so far. I like many of his qualities for example he’s been respectful and chivalrous: didn’t try anything physical on our first date, hasn’t been pushing for sex, only kissed on our previous dates, listened to my boundary of less tongue after inserting it immediately our first kiss, told me “you’re so beautiful”, paid for our recent dinner after we split the previous one, we’ve had great chemistry/banter, opens doors and pours water, asked me my favorite flower, already initiating dates for weeks from now. Conversation flows and I'm attracted to him, both physically and otherwise, but I'm conflicted about the physical intimacy recently escalating past our emotional/mental connection.

We went to his place for the first time on our fifth date and I suggested we cuddle which turned into more. He wanted to finger and go down on me at the same time right off the bat, whereas I’m more used to fingering on its own first to let things unfold gradually. He said it's been a few years since his most recent relationship (LTR), so we agreed we’re both learning about each other. We continued kissing and all, but he repeatedly said he wants to be inside of me (not in a pressuring way, but I don't know what to say to that) after I already explained I prefer easing into physical intimacy slowly and am more traditional.

After a while, I asked if he could say something dirty but was shocked when he said “you’re a little slut aren’t you” when trying to dirty talk. He didn't apologize but admitted he's not good at it. I don't like the word 'slut', but I didn’t want to make things more awkward after we just had a discussion about my preferences for going slow with fingering first before more happens. He said he will do so when the moment comes up again, which I thought meant another day, but he soon initiated fingering and our chemistry is so strong I let him go down on me right after that. He also started asking me sex-related questions like how kinky I am, what's a no-go in the bedroom, and said he used to have a sex swing.

He also promised to share all of the photos of us from his phone but only sent one at first until I followed up and has complained about or judged each of my date ideas in some way or another - the food, declined my venue idea (my favorite spot) since he's been there a few times already, and an accessory I just excitedly bought. I noticed he didn't ask about my parents whereas I was trying to get to know him on a deeper level during our date, but we did touch on it during our first date (surface level though).

Please help me out, everyone. I would really appreciate any help or advice! Are there any red flags or is he just a more sexual guy who’s genuinely attracted to me with good intentions? Does he seem to be in it for casual or short-term versus a long-term relationship? Am I overthinking any of this? Instead of asking to take a break, should I scale back and explain to him I'm busy (which I am) on our next date, or wait until he asks me to come over again before opening that topic? Should I bring up the 'slut' term in person on our next date or wait until we’re intimate like that again and first see if he says it again before speaking up?

Hi, I'm Fyn. Sound engineer in Portland, OR. Into retro computing (mostly 80s home computers), mechanical keyboards, and climbing. I've been around the fediverse a while now (Mastodon - @fyn@mstdn.party) and wanted a home on the forum side of things. Nice to meet you all, and happy to answer any questions.

The internet sucks a lot right now. I know it's full of AI and scammers, the Lemmy users are helpful to spread warnings about them everyday. It's a little disheartening though to know that a lot of the warning signs are way above my entry level knowledge. Is there anyplace "safe" where someone can ask questions or even hire (not a job request post!) someone to help make a website without getting something that looks pretty but is actually a vibe coded nightmare?

Alternatively, what should laymen like myself be on the lookout for when trying to interact with this field? A real doctor can show credentials and answer questions, a real artist has a portfolio and can talk you through their process, I don't know what to ask a website maker person

thanks :3

At this point, it’s become a bit meme on Reddit to share the creepy or disgusting DMs you receive. However, nothing like that has happened to me here yet, even though I’ve been active for the equivalent of three or four of those pervy chat invitations on Reddit. I’m no less active here.

if you are learning something how do you not be on tutorial hell

I discovered Gemini in 2023 and really enjoy it. I like the minimalism. I like that page presentation is up to the user. I've even come to appreciate the line-based nature of its markup, because theoretically at least, it means a screen reader user knows that elements are always arranged top to bottom.

I say "theoretically" since I have yet to run into an accessible Gemini browser for Windows, which is unfortunate since Gemini's whole deal is text first.

And to head off the inevitable comment about Linux, in order to have an accessible app you need an accessible OS for it to sit on top of.

I eat a pretty high protein diet which has the side-effect of giving me really big ones. Sometime my farties exit my anus with such turbulence that it feels like they could do damage. After multiple decade of farties and lots of other wear and tear, could ripping huge ones give me fissures?

This part gripes me when they travel to "less fortunate" or "poor" countries where eating out is $0.50-2.00 but the same or similar thing is $30-500 in the US, however: people earn different levels of income. Like in that "third world" country, people may only live with $10 a day while Americans live with either $7.25 / $15 per hour in minimum wage, so it's not comparable as to why the prices are seen as "cheap" by Americans.

Now, put it this way: if an average joe were to earn the FEDERAL mandated minimum wage of $7.25, is buying a whole weeks worth of groceries affordable with that alone (excluding rent, utilities, insurance, etc)? Do you consider a $200 semi-fancy dinner at a restaurant (not over the top luxurious, but formal & fine dining) with family or friends "cheap" in the US whilst earning $15 (or even $30) per hour in minimum wage?

I have leggings with mesh I use to workout and lounging, for everything basically. I'm thinking about buying a pair of leggings with no mesh, synthetic material also, for daily use as well.

I have the feeling that the ones with mesh cool faster and don't smell funky as quickly as the models with no mesh. I don't know if I'm imagining things.

The ones with no mesh should keep me warm longer and be better for winter?

both leggings are a mix of polyester and spandex: 20% spandex on the mesh model, 33% spandex on the no mesh one.

I’m getting really tired of “verify you’re not a bot” checks everywhere.

I understand these checks help prevent bots, but they seem to appear on so many websites now. Does anyone else find them frustrating?

͏

No, i don't drink coffee, nor do i drink energy drinks.

Edit: i fucking hate autocorrect

Edit 2: thank you all for the great advice, you all are helping me maximize my procrastination potential

Okay maybe this isnt the best demographics here but like I mean as in if you know someone who's Gen Z, do they have a "idk how to cook" issue?

(Please don't be like "omg its easy, how could you not know" in the comments, be nice in the comments okay 🙈)

I just finished a PhD in stats, and before that, studied computer science. I had planned to go back to industry to do software engineering or be a data scientist afterwards.

However, it seems that in the meantime, vibe coding has taken over the software industry and swallowed most data scientist roles. Few open positions, and the ones that do exist are just pushing a button instead of thinking and solving problems. Is this a correct assessment? Should I try to get back in or just find a new career? I am not too keen on staying in academia either.

I remember that awkward period after we outgrew floppies but before USB flash storage became mainstream when CD-RW and CD+RW (Yes there was a difference and it mattered!) being peddled as the next portable storage format. My first USB stick was 128 megabytes and cost around $60. I actually still have it, but it may no longer work. I believe I bought it in around 2003 or 2004. I remember them steadily decreasing in price, or at least price per unit storage, very quickly over the ensuing years, to the point where they were giving away multi-gig sticks by around 2009 or 2010.

Verification Codes.

One-Time my ass, more like, repeated times. I'm so tired of verification codes up the ass these days. Just today, I had to reset my PayPal password. So that meant there was a code sent to an e-mail address after the reset process was set, to begin with. Then I had to go through the obstacle of verifying the information of the account. And then even after the password was reset, I'm sent ANOTHER freaking code right after!

And it's even more frustrating to deal with, with my bank. I've gotten random verification checks for making internal transfers within my account. Things I've done without any issue. But just one day, I got THREE verification checks to do what I needed to do!

This verification shit has gotten out of hand! I want it to just die, just like captcha. Whatever purpose they originally were intended to do, is lost in translation, because now they're just obstacles that wastes our time every minute we have to bother with them.

Hello Lemmy. I have completed my bachelor’s degree and will start a master’s program in April. This means that I am lucky to have a lot of free time in the next few months. I want to take this opportunity to spend time with my grandma, because she is very old and I probably won’t have that chance again. My question is, how would you spend time with your grandma if she was still alive or you had the necessary time?

well it works like this:

basically it is a decentralized search engine that uses activity pub (so probably it is technically in the fediverse)

how??

well instead of the thing scraping the entire web (which is probably by what you guess has many implications and is probably impossible)

it is a human made database of websites that syncs with other databases of websites

so if there for example are 2 databases in 2 servers each with 50 websites: you can get 100 websites

and to make it easier for links and more to be added

i make requests: which are requests for a specific websites or URL to be added, which can be approved or denied

how do you fix such idea