150
submitted 2 years ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

i just thought of that and was like wow china is so scary

top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top new old
[-] [email protected] 52 points 2 years ago
[-] [email protected] 48 points 2 years ago
load more comments (1 replies)
[-] [email protected] 28 points 2 years ago

this never happened #fakenews

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] [email protected] 32 points 2 years ago

that would be fucked up and scary, wow

[-] [email protected] 24 points 2 years ago

It makes me sick they'd even want to do this I mean what is wrong with them

[-] [email protected] 18 points 2 years ago

Look up "asiatic skull"

Not on google of course, they hide the TRUTH

[-] [email protected] 30 points 2 years ago

Like the borehole that ussr built for "science"

[-] [email protected] 34 points 2 years ago

Look, dudes rock, and they don't need to come up excuses for when they just want to dig a big hole

[-] [email protected] 33 points 2 years ago

You mean the USSRussy?

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] [email protected] 27 points 2 years ago

They better not be because that’s supposed to be my thing

[-] [email protected] 26 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

China looked at me once and said and it scared me

[-] [email protected] 26 points 2 years ago

We have to use the nukes

[-] [email protected] 25 points 2 years ago

Seems likely. We wouldn't even know because it's always night over there when it's day over here, but it's night over hear when it's day over there, so we wouldn't be able to see it!

[-] [email protected] 29 points 2 years ago

China's several timezones ahead, so they can stab us from the future. We can't see it coming. We need to develop our counter knife program immediately so that we can stab them from the past as a preemptive defense!

[-] [email protected] 14 points 2 years ago

it's time to bring back the giant spoon. it was a shield all along. stalin-spoon

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] [email protected] 18 points 2 years ago

We must take control of the sun!

[-] [email protected] 20 points 2 years ago

It's on my agenda after we crash mercury in to mars as part of my scientific plan to fix astrology.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] [email protected] 25 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

☝🤓 uhm akshually if China built a knife like that they would only be able to stab parts of South America

https://engaging-data.com/antipodes-map/

[-] [email protected] 23 points 2 years ago

they could stab at an angle, the chinese know about angles.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] [email protected] 15 points 2 years ago

this website is really cool!

[-] [email protected] 24 points 2 years ago
[-] [email protected] 31 points 2 years ago

they could stab you through the floor just for posting "tinman square" even tho its your free speech

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] [email protected] 21 points 2 years ago

Wait do you think they are, though?

[-] [email protected] 24 points 2 years ago

OH LOOK ITS THE CHINESE SPY BOTS COMING OUT IN FORCE TO DENY THE ULTRAKNIFE WOW OK WE KNOW BUT OK

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[-] [email protected] 20 points 2 years ago

does this therefore prophesize that a future socialist project will unleash the giant fork upon the world in 2100?

or do you think President Kim is already working on it?

[-] [email protected] 19 points 2 years ago
[-] [email protected] 19 points 2 years ago

Damn, real if true 😔

[-] [email protected] 18 points 2 years ago

if china has the knife and russia has the spoon who has the fork?

[-] [email protected] 18 points 2 years ago

Germany. They have human forks. There was meme going on in China where DW published an article about "Human Rights in China" and the cover said "Human Forks" instead of Human Rights really big in Chinese because surprise surprise, German state media knows nothing about China.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] [email protected] 15 points 2 years ago
[-] [email protected] 17 points 2 years ago

Give me 3000 words and we'll get you in NYT

[-] [email protected] 14 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

ChinaKnife: The Ultimate Weapon?

Last night news broke on a Chinese disinformation space, Hexbear.net, that China is potentially developing a weapon of mass destruction. User "Happybadger" announced that the superweapon is capable of assassinating any person anywhere on Earth, utilising the core itself to shield itself from any warning systems. This weapon required well over a decade of covert research to design and will effectively hold the planet hostage down to the level of the individual world leader or dissident. The weapon is reported to consist of a gigantic knife of unknown composition, likely a titanium alloy if not a secret material, which pierces through the ground to stab the victim. This superweapon is believed to be at least 7,926mi (12,756km) long, built without disclosure to any other member of the UN. This distance ensures that it can pierce the full diameter of the planet. It is presumably longer so that the knife can kill its victim even if they are in a tall building such as the One World Trade Centre. This building was constructed in the aftermath of the collapse of the previous World Trade Centre buildings which were infamously destroyed in the 9/11 attacks. China has not responded to repeated email inquiries confirming or denying this story, even to [email protected] which is reported to be the personal email account of Chinese leader Xi Jinping. Mr. Jinping would surely have full knowledge of the hyper-knife, or ChinaKnife as it's being called by at least one media outlet, and would have overseen its development. It is imperative that the US military consider a preemptive nuclear strike.

[-] [email protected] 17 points 2 years ago

RULES OF NATURE

[-] [email protected] 16 points 2 years ago

sargeras no

[-] [email protected] 15 points 2 years ago

It's okay, because it will just leave a big Scar that you can use to make anything Possible by playing your Perhapsadian (also maybe don't fuck a New Crobuzon spy because he'll just use you to carry out his agenda)

[-] [email protected] 15 points 2 years ago

Good! serves them dirty hobitses right!

[-] [email protected] 14 points 2 years ago
[-] [email protected] 12 points 2 years ago

They'd be Gin from Bleach

[-] [email protected] 12 points 2 years ago

Work is like kicking my ass today.

load more comments
view more: next ›
this post was submitted on 17 Aug 2023
150 points (100.0% liked)

chapotraphouse

13851 readers
543 users here now

Banned? DM Wmill to appeal.

No anti-nautilism posts. See: Eco-fascism Primer

Slop posts go in c/slop. Don't post low-hanging fruit here.

founded 4 years ago
MODERATORS