the only way to watch shrek is to start with shrek the third until exactly the moment at which fiona reveals she's pregnant, at which point you flashback to shrek 1 and watch it all the way through TWICE before returning to finish shrek 3. then you watch shrek 2, take a quick puss break (both movies) then move on to shrek forever after
(this is how star wars fans sound)
That's a very postmodern viewing of Shrek. I prefer to watch Shrek 2 and imagine where the characters came from and where they're going. There is a direct, lived connection to history. Fiona doesn't just fall out of a coconut tree and reveal she's pregnant.
People will unironically tell you to watch Evangelion this way.
Also how some people will tell you how to read all 3 volumes of Capital.
Machete order is evidence that extreme plot twists-brain is counterproductive to actually enjoying art.
1+2+3 = 6
2*3 = 6
Makes sense
Some of my dates may leave, but that's a price I'm willing to pay. 
Why watch anything other than the peak of the franchise? 
Especially when you've got a shrekxpert next to you and he has the IMDB page pulled up. I'm prepared to answer any Shrek 2 question they had across three whole viewings and they'd rather watch Shrek 3 with no context apart from Shrek 1 and 2.
Some people just don't have respect for the craft. Smdh.
They should adjust their Shrek-pectations 
Great Shrek-pectations
Perfection!
It’s not that you are wrong, it’s that you didn’t communicate and compromise.
If I invite someone out to "dinner and a movie", that doesn't need extra layers of communication. We're immediately going to my apartment and watching Shrek 2 on my laptop three times in a row. No talking, no sex, no food until it's over so we aren't distracted.
I see the problem, you need to tell them it's a movie and dinner so they don't expect to be immediately fed.
The real issue is the no sex during Shrek. Everyone knows the proper way to watch Shrek is to dress up like the characters and orgy while the movie plays.
I can't believe you even asked to watched the films without revisiting the source material first
I was saving the novel for after. It doesn't add much to the Shrek 2 experience that repeat viewings of Shrek 2 don't already add.
Must Love Shrek :kelly:
That was literally on my profile and they didn't seem to notice. They kept asking if I wanted to have sex even though I said we need to concentrate on Shrek 2.
Sounds like you dodged a bullet.
You made a classic blunder. The first thing is you do is make them watch only the Fat Bastard scenes from Austin Powers. Then you start Shrek 2. After watching it twice you finish the night with a showing of Gymkata.
Women amirite
If tinder is any indication many of them are Shrek philistines who only want to focus on their careers and goals.
So disrespectful smh
If that’s enough to ruin a date then they clearly weren’t that into you. Sorry pal
I assume they were into me because they said "wow that's cool" when I showed them how many edits I have on the Shrek 2 wikipedia page. They just have terrible taste in Shrek, not men in general.
Okay I will not stand for this Shrek 1 slander, that movie is a classic. Yeah Shrek 2 is better but without the first one the second one wouldn't exist, checkmate liberal 
I cannot tell you the number of times I've tried to get the Shrek 1 wikipedia page deleted for lack of notoriety. People shouldn't even know it exists. The series should start AND END with Shrek 2. If at the end of Shrek 2 you want more Shrek, watch it again knowing you're getting the premium Shrek experience each time.
Shrek the third is non canon, it just goes 1 -> 2 -> 4
Shrek the Third is 93 mins while Shrek 2 is only 92 mins. Shrek the third is objectively better.
93 minutes of uninspiring Shrek. At least I can watch those 92 minutes without feeling like I'm some dirty Victorian street urchin watching a two pence panto show put together by a man who smells like shit. Shrek 2 is professionally composed in every regard and that's why it's the only one worth watching. When I breed, my kids won't even know Shrek 1 or 3 exist.
You’re obviously not a film expert
Sounds like a good time to me.
Banned? DM Wmill to appeal.
No anti-nautilism posts. See: Eco-fascism Primer
Slop posts go in c/slop. Don't post low-hanging fruit here.