WE’RE A FAMILY. Now go to your cubicle without enough pay to afford dinner.

Applies for "The Office: Operation Dwight"

(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻

Jim's camera

"Well here I go again...!"

'Colin Robinson; Energy Vampire' uses that tactic

This has always been my problem with conflating "family" with "office". It's tragically subjective, and usually for the worse.

Some people have garbage family dynamics, with no counseling in sight. So these same people trot this steaming pile of bad values, reactionary behavior, trauma dumping, triggers, and more right into the workplace like it's totally normal.

In a smaller way, I also see managers emulate mom or dad to run their little piece of the company. All the while, not understanding that they themselves were horribly abused by their parents and think that behavior is completely a-okay to project onto their team.

Have you considered night shift?

I mean, yes it'll destroy your sleep schedule but it is very chill.

I just saw that my job advertises that they don’t charge you for the uniform…

I saw "competitive wage" and it was literally minimum wage 💔

My wife is a tenured professor and her university still makes her pay for parking on their own lots.

I had a recruiter call me up and ask me how I hadn’t found a job with all these postings. Like, lady, they’re not real!

Recently saw the place I left a year ago put up a posting. It was word-for-word the same as the job I applied for 4 years previously but it had an extra sentence: MUST HAVE A GOOD SENSE OF HUMOUR.

This is code for: MUST BE OKAY WITH THE OWNER'S RAMPANT HOMO AND TRANS PHOBIA.

Yeah I worked at a T1 help desk that had a pretty consistent high call volume but still gave us enough access to actually fix shit and I low key loved that job. I was good at it, There was a decent amount of variety, no on call, no real responsibility because anything we couldn't fix got escalated up the chain. It was great. Just clock out at the end of the day and don't think about it until I worked next.

Conversely my current job which pays far better is the second type you described and it's fucking miserable.

We're just like a family.

Any time there's an emergency, day or night, you're supposed immediately to drop everything to take care of us and demand nothing in return.

Same here! "We're a family". It was an abusive relationship where the CEO was the narcissistic abuser. God he treated everyone like crap in that place.

or the classic "we wanted to downsize the employee budget to pad the CEOs salary, so we fired half our staff and the remaining plebs do twice the work because fuck you thats why"

No, now it's only $3.50 a hour more than a fast food job with unpaid overtime.

Oh GOD no

And don't think that 120% will grant you a raise either! Inflation will eat 5% of your paycheck each year!

nO 1 wAnTs 2 wOrK nE mOaR!!!1!11!1