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Do you think you could fight Cookie Monster? (hexbear.net)

submitted 7 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

13 comments fedilink hide all child comments

He's almost as tall as Big Bird and probably way heavier. Even a panda will fuck you up and that's the least generous animal comparison. He isn't smart though so I think I could win. Distract with cookie and go for the neck.

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I would want to make friends with him aubrey-happy

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

And if he couldn't be reasoned with?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

hesitation-2 hesitation-1

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago

exhales weed smoke bro, fucking, fucking cookie monster could fuck you up, especially when he's sober and not on the cookie dough.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

Hell no. Do you see how broad he is?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

We'll know if Hollywood was in this thread. There will be a Terminator spinoff...

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Why would I want to? Most muppets are friends, not foes.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

What if you both survived a plane crash and you only had a cookie? You don't get to choose to not fight him in that scenario. You can fight him over the cookie or over the corpses.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

I would simply take him off my hand.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

Yes, I would just bake a whole ton of cookies, then he'd be my best friend or something. Easiest way to win a fight, turn your enemies into your allies.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

Just feed him a cyanide cookie

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Do I get prep time? And if so, does Cookie Monster get prep time too?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

You don't always get prep time in a combat situation. That's why I go for the neck. Paralyse the enemy and then prepare.