this post was submitted on 10 Feb 2025
38 points (100.0% liked)

askchapo

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 week ago (1 children)

They can't say no to playing whatever super long and complicated board game I suggest.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

This one! This one!

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

Blood Gulch is the path to enlightenment

[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 week ago

I’d get burnt out and disinterested within a week a quickly be murdered and replaced by a member of my inner circle

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 week ago

Tell them killing billionaires and getting away with it assures you a place in heaven

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 week ago
[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 week ago

I'd definitely Jonestown those losers.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 week ago (2 children)

It'd be fun for about a year, then I'd get bored of being in charge of people and try to ghost everyone

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 week ago

So basically every religion?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 week ago

Send wave after wave of drugged-up soul-berserkers slamming into the local police department

Teach them to give me a ticket for burning leaves without a permit

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 week ago

I've always thought my personality would be a double edged sword for being a cult leader. I'm a great storyteller, but I also get bored and leave quickly

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 week ago

Have them feed me grapes while I larp as living god

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I’d be too lazy to maintain a cult for longer than like a week so probably not much

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

Yeah, seems like a lot of work

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Make them read me bedtime stories

wtf-am-i-reading niko-sleep

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago

They have to watch One Piece

They have to read Marx

They have to do BJJ

Do meal prep for me

$50/mo membership fee

Then they get to just chill and hang out.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

Convince everyone to buy into my multi level marketing scheme then mysteriously vanish never to be seen again

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

The unfunny joke is that I would do exactly what every other cult leader does. There is a reason cults are the way they are because that is what works. If you make it about comunism the cia kills you. If you don't let people do sex crimes in it they start their own offshoot.

That being said, that cults seem to be made by the combination of freedom from capital restraints and the fawn responce to trauma. You would think you could get a selective breeding program out of it. Just get a little weird for fun you know. Make an actually DnD party.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

We’d start a newspaper

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago

Do an Earthseed

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago

ask them to give me money, and then give the money to more capable people