all 24 comments

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[–] 26 points 2 years ago (1 child)

They can't say no to playing whatever super long and complicated board game I suggest.

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  • [–] 25 points 2 years ago (1 child)
  • [–] 24 points 2 years ago

    I’d get burnt out and disinterested within a week a quickly be murdered and replaced by a member of my inner circle

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  • [–] 20 points 2 years ago

    Tell them killing billionaires and getting away with it assures you a place in heaven

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  • [+] 18 points 2 years ago* (last edited 1 year ago)
    [–] 17 points 2 years ago (3 children)

    It'd be fun for about a year, then I'd get bored of being in charge of people and try to ghost everyone

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  • [–] 17 points 2 years ago

    I'd definitely Jonestown those losers.

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  • [–] 16 points 2 years ago

    Send wave after wave of drugged-up soul-berserkers slamming into the local police department

    Teach them to give me a ticket for burning leaves without a permit

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  • [–] 12 points 2 years ago

    Have them feed me grapes while I larp as living god

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  • [–] 12 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    I’d be too lazy to maintain a cult for longer than like a week so probably not much

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  • [–] 12 points 2 years ago

    I've always thought my personality would be a double edged sword for being a cult leader. I'm a great storyteller, but I also get bored and leave quickly

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  • [–] 11 points 2 years ago*

    Make them read me bedtime stories

    wtf-am-i-reading niko-sleep

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  • They have to watch One Piece

    They have to read Marx

    They have to do BJJ

    Do meal prep for me

    $50/mo membership fee

    Then they get to just chill and hang out.

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  • [–] 6 points 2 years ago

    Convince everyone to buy into my multi level marketing scheme then mysteriously vanish never to be seen again

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  • [–] 4 points 2 years ago*

    The unfunny joke is that I would do exactly what every other cult leader does. There is a reason cults are the way they are because that is what works. If you make it about comunism the cia kills you. If you don't let people do sex crimes in it they start their own offshoot.

    That being said, that cults seem to be made by the combination of freedom from capital restraints and the fawn responce to trauma. You would think you could get a selective breeding program out of it. Just get a little weird for fun you know. Make an actually DnD party.

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  • [+] 4 points 2 years ago* (last edited 1 year ago)
    [removed by mod]
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  • [–] 2 points 2 years ago

    ask them to give me money, and then give the money to more capable people

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  • [–] 2 points 2 years ago

    Do an Earthseed

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