this post was submitted on 30 Oct 2024
192 points (93.2% liked)

okmatewanker

686 readers
8 users here now

No foul language - i.e. French 🤮

Obviously satire, dozy wankers

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 61 points 1 month ago (3 children)

This person clearly has no taste

I get highlighting England for the meme (though the modern UK has some of the best food culture in the world)

But Germany, Belgium, Denmark & Austria? I'm sorry, OP clearly has never travelled outside their hometown and eaten nothing but white bread.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

It's the Germanic countries, simple as.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 54 points 1 month ago (6 children)

Swede here. Before we imported potatoes in the late 1700s all we had were beets. Just beets. Beets everywhere.

What did you expect.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago

that's not fair, we had parsnips too, which are honestly pretty alright. It's like fibrous less sweet carrots.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

And alcohol. And trees, darkness, cold, mud, did I mention darkness?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I supposed I expected swedes.

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Also german food is not that dire. What's wrong with minced pork sandwiches, kale stew and breaded sausage?

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago (7 children)

And Schnitzel, I love a good Schnitzel!

Plus Sauerkraut is the most versatile and delicious thing ever.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Hard disagree on sauerkraut, you can have my share. But I'd hit someone with a Spaten for a Jägerschnitzel right about now.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Hit a Jäger, make Schnitzel of him.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Germans couldn't cook Schnitzel if their live would depend on it, and then dump a shitton of sauce on top to cover up their crimes against culinary

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

there is a myriad of different types of schnitzel.

If there's a lot of sauce and you feel that shouldn't be there, you should have specified what kind of schnitzel you want.

the Classics: Schnitzel Wiener Art (pig) or Wiener Schnitzel (baby cow) do not come with sauce on top at all.

they are standard recipes, you get exactly what you expect everywhere. it also pretty much tastes the same in every restaurant... no matter if its in Austria, Bavaria or even Hamburg. (..unless you order it in a shit tier restaurant where shit tier meat is used)

extensive testing in hundreds of restaurants beyond the border and within lead to my above conclusion

alt text: im really boring. i always order schnitzel, its the safest bet to get reliably tasty food

alt text 2: also fuck you, your crimes against the schnitzel will be punished with extra sauce!

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (5 replies)
[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (3 children)

What happened to everywhere on the planet apart from Germany to make bread so dire?

I could eat different German breads every day for a week, and not be bored.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

You get bread from a small bakery instead of a huge chain, you get exactly the same thing. Shit's so great you can eat it without anything on it and it still is good / not boring.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Frowns in Finnish rye bread. That shit's delicious. Especially the dark ones with syrup which are slightly sweet.

Or archipelago bread, made with sour milk.

Or cumin bread.

A nice Northern flatbread. Or a crispbread with some hard cheese and peasoup.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Well, no yummy Wienerschnitzel for you then!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

People are constantly underestinating Germany. Like half the food is fried in butter and is delicious.

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago (4 children)

I'd heard the slander about Irish food but when I visited I had beef and Guinness pies, spiced stuffed mushrooms and herbaceous handmade brats.

also had a potato chip butter sandwich, but I was quite deep in the cups by that point and it tasted great.

could not complain.

haven't been to Britain yet.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

Tayto sandwich feckin rules

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I'd heard the slander about Irish food but when I visited I had beef and Guinness pies, spiced stuffed mushrooms and herbaceous handmade brats.

That’s just something they serve there in the Irish themed pubs for the tourists.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

not in my experience, those were fairly common menu items in restaurants.

besides, that was far from an exhaustive list of the good food in Ireland.

also, irish themed pubs?

in Ireland?

you mean "pubs"?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Sorry, I should have added a /joke or something on the end.

There was/is a proliferation of Irish themed pubs in other countries that give a false impression of what pubs in Ireland are like, as well as some actual Irish pubs in very touristy areas doing the same. The standard explanation being “it’s just for the tourists”.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Sounds quite similar to Steak and Ale pies, various curried items and herby sausages you'd find across the UK.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I'm sure.

I've been to a lot of countries, and food stereotypes are almost always misinterpreted or false.

a person who had lived in Ireland for a year told me the food was terrible and specifically mentioned the stews, how difficult she found it to get good food.

by which I guess she meant sandwiches?

then I ate several stews in Ireland and I was like how the heck could you possibly hate a boldly flavored savory beef and veg stew, especially during the colder part of the year?

to the point where you damned the entire cuisine?

speaking of stereotypes, I'm in India right now, and curry is not super popular here.

it's just not a very popular dish.

they have tons of sauces and gravies, and spiced lentil soups, but curry is way down on the list in terms of popularity.

wouldn't have guessed.

ireland was supposed to have terrible food from firsthand accounts people I knew who traveled there, and I had a bunch of great food there.

I think people just don't like things that are different than they're used to, so if they travel somewhere for a week and they aren't used to the texture or taste of something, they try it once, get surprised and assume it's bad.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago

Also love shading the Faroes and Shetland specifically. That’s very funny. It’s a couple of archipelagos in the sea. In the howling North Sea at that. They’re tiny islands not known for agricultural bounty. How much culinary choice do you think they historically had? They aren’t exactly growing pineapples up there. Of course it’s all fish and dried mutton.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Tikki masala carrying all of Scotland's cuisine reputation

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I eat sauerkraut from the jar with a fork.

Then I drink the brine.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

This whole food thing. It's so subjective. How has it reached this stage? 😄😄

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

I'm a proud Celt! Fuck them Anglo-Saxons!

Genetic testing kicks down the door

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

luv me 'aggis and marag gheal, 'ate me black pudding

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

At the very least the Scots know that deep-frying stuff makes it better even it was kinda dire to begin with.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

This is racism against the Irish

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The best food I’ve had in England was from other countries.

What’s up with German food? Didn’t know it was disliked…I’ve had plenty of good German food.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

Austrian food is pretty much enjoyable. Irish food on the other hand... 🙄

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

I'll totally agree with Norway. Did a 3 week road trip from Oslo to Å and back this summer. Got sick of hamburgers, pizza, and fake "kebabs" real fast. I expected to be eating so much fresh fish, but it was fairly rare to find. Best meal I had was a Thai "restaurant" attached to a one pump gas station in the middle of nowhere run by the sweetest Thai grandma. It took some back and forth to convince her I wasn't Norwegian and wanted actual Thai spicy. And it was excellent.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Why those 2 specific small areas of Finland?

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I believe this is just a map of Germanic peoples.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Thanks for pointing that out.

However it didn’t answer my question and I’m now heading down a google rabbit hole to find out if it’s a mistake on the map or something far more historically interesting.

Edit: nothing interesting, just the territorially defined Swedish language area.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I condemn Knödel and Klöße slander and who looks at Kaiserschmarn and Apfelstrudel and sees dire food?

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I don't think our Swiss food is so bad... Also what's the big difference between German and Czech food, it seemed pretty similar to me when I was in Brno.

But worst of all is shading Ticino the same as the North of Switzerland. Their food is just like Italian food, so you take that back right now!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Finland not included?

Let me tell you the recipe for the Finnish national dish: Karelian stew.

Cubes of meat. Beef, pork, lamb. Put them in water. Add salt, (but like less than you'd actually need.)

Chuck it in the oven for hours.

Done.

No pepper. No vegetables. Nothing. Cubes of meat and salt.

God I hate Finland. There's great parts and definitely easymode compared to a lot of places, but there's problems as well. A lot, actually. Just very different.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (35 children)

Karelian stew is simple peasant food, easy to make but fulfilling. It's that but also delicious. It's not supposed to go toe-to-toe with the whole culinary world.

load more comments (35 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Fuck that. German food is awesome. Swedish food is awesome.

And how can you not include finland? They don't serve anything unless it is either grey or brown.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I mean, steak pies are delicious.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (9 children)

In my opinion as a "foreigner" living in the UK the biggest problem with the British cuisine is marketing.

You have all the pies which are awesome, steak and ale, kidney pie, Toad in the hole, beef wellington, the Cornish pasties...

Then cottage and shepherd's pie which are not in the same category even though they share name, because they're not bread pies but a "potato mash lasagne".

There's the Sunday roast, and all things game are excellent - this country has a longstanding tradition of game and you often see in pubs things like venison wellington, especially in the countryside.

Also fish and chips has the reputation of being fast food, but a proper one from a pub rather than a chippie is usually excellent.

If we think about snacks, there's many really nice things typical from the UK, that we routinely dismiss because we don't think of a homemade version but what you can get from a supermarket. Sausage rolls, scotch eggs, things like that.

And desserts - this country has a sweet tooth. Trifles, anything with rhubarb in it (rhubarb is quite rare in Mediterranean countries), sticky toffee pudding, Eton mess, rice pudding, crumble...

I have missed many things like the ploughman's, all of the cheeses, or the haggis which is hated almost exclusively by people who've never tried it before.

Yet all of this gets routinely reduced to "fish and chips". It's like saying Italian cuisine is only pasta or all Spanish can make is paella. I find quite sad that Brits don't do a better job at marketing their cuisine.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Wow, well said

load more comments (8 replies)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Fuck you, more Pinnekjøtt and Fårikål for me

load more comments
view more: next ›