this post was submitted on 26 Sep 2024
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Microblog Memes

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[–] [email protected] 256 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (2 children)

He sucked 100 dicks and with that knowledge and experience in the end he finally chose hers.

Remember that.

[–] [email protected] 75 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Either way I feel it's more important how many dicks they sucked after entering the relationship.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

I personally don't want to know about before and won 't ask, but that's up to everyone's personal relationship standards.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 3 weeks ago (8 children)

My wife and I were both open about ours, and being open about it made trusting easier. I'm not sure who would have an problem knowing approximate numbers unless they have jealousy issues or are judgy.

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[–] [email protected] 30 points 3 weeks ago

When you're bi curious, but you also respect the scientific method and so you require a large sample size to make an informed decision.

[–] [email protected] 155 points 3 weeks ago (6 children)
[–] [email protected] 93 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!

[–] [email protected] 35 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 40 points 3 weeks ago

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

[–] [email protected] 28 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (3 children)

It's written almost as if he did it the night before the wedding, which would be an impressive trick for a bachelor party.

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Just bring her lasagna at work. She'll get over it.

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[–] [email protected] 86 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

It's not dick sucking quantity that matters, but dick sucking quality

[–] [email protected] 32 points 3 weeks ago

"I swear I really went for it, babe. I was buckling knees..."

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Hard disagree. It's about optimizing the dick sucking.

I'm betting if you line three guys into a triangle, you can suck three dicks at once.

This will allow you hit 99 dicks in only 33 sucking motions.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago

Quantity has a quality all its own. Jumps into pile of dicks.

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[–] [email protected] 63 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

He sucked their dicks, but did he suck their hearts?

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[–] [email protected] 57 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

It’s surprisingly not that hard to put up those kinds of numbers. It does not matter your gender or physical appearance, you can find at least one hundred guys willing to let you suck their dick.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm afraid to test your theory.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

If you do test their theory, get tested often.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

My experience on Grindr says otherwise.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Sometimes you’ve gotta be brave enough to check out the blank profiles lol.

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[–] [email protected] 52 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

When I first got together with my wife she insisted that neither of us share with each other of our past relationships or sexual experiences. I was fine with it because I always believed in the ignorance is bliss mantra for certain circumstances. After about a decade of marriage and a couple of kids she starts asking and stuff. I didn't really want to share but she told me about how she had a threesome while in college a couple of times. I did admit that I was a bit jealous. She also told me that she slept around a lot in college and that her count was like 50-60 she can't really remember. But then she asked about mine and that's when I told her about the escorts. That's when she got mad about me telling her about my past.

[–] [email protected] 104 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

that’s when I told her about the escorts.

Jesus Christ, never admit that you drove a Ford.

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago

I mean... it's probably good to talk about these things before getting married, since it will inevitably lead to unresolved feelings later on. I wouldn't mind if, for instance, my partner was a slut while I was a sexless virgin before we got together, but I would at least want to know that about them. In my mind you're supposed to talk about your life experiences with your partner, and sex is falls under that umbrella. Idk, maybe I'm weird for thinking that.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 3 weeks ago (10 children)

As long as it wasn't in a row

[–] [email protected] 36 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Are you envisaging a sort of grid arrangement?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago

No a spiral. Makes the ol’ suck and tug much easier.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 weeks ago

Sequential list, surely. Though maybe you could suck off the current and .next at the same time.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago

What if was in a column?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 weeks ago

Don't kink shame me!

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 2 weeks ago

She's just upset because her number is so low comparingly

[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

How do you get 100+ people to let you suck their dicks? Asking for a friend.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

You ask politely one at a time.

Doesn't have to be polite all the time either.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

i just cant imagine giving a shit about this. like how insecure do you have to be after 16 years to care??

[–] [email protected] 51 points 3 weeks ago (7 children)

The joke is after 16 years finding out your husband is into cock.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 weeks ago
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[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 weeks ago

Well, I mean, as long as you made enough to afford the engagement ring.

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