75
Hi everybody!
~~no big post this week,~~ down with cis
since multiple people recognized it, it's not officially OTD Appreciation Week!
cheers
I hope everybody has a lovely week!
Join our public Matrix server!
https://rentry.co/tracha#tracha-rooms
As a reminder, please do not discuss current struggle sessions in the mega. We want this to be a little oasis for all of us and the best way to do that is not to feed into existing conflict on the site.
Also, be sure to properly give content warnings and put sensitive subjects behind proper spoiler tags. It's for the mental health of not just your comrades, but yourself as well.
Here is a screenshot of where to find the spoiler button.
spoiler
Being closeted is its own special circle of hell. I know my identity but most people don't. Every interaction feels fake and hollow.
Hopefully only another year of this. I can get laser in that time. Have time to voice train but probably won't. Fuck me
It really is. This is why I ran out of the closet well before I had even started any sort of medical transition. Said fuck it, it's other people's problem if they can't see me for me once it's explained to them. In some ways I'm sure it seemed like I was abandoning self preservation, but in other ways it was self preservation.
I feel you. The people who know treat me like a human being but for the people who don’t, it’s just a merry-go-round of “sir, him, mr” and I know it’s unfair to expect anything when I haven’t had the guts to ask them to act differently but it still majorly sucks
It is not unfair. You should hold these fools in disdain. They are spiritually barren and have nothing to offer you
These fools are my coworkers! But it is the same conciliatory attitude I took towards family after having come out, so probably best to nip that reflex in the bud. At least some women there are starting to clock me, that’s nice :)
Seconding on that fakeness/hollowness. Really hard for cis people to understand just how deep dysphoria goes.
Them not understanding is so frustrating, I've tried talking to a couple of them about my voice dysphoria, which seems really understandable to me but they didn't get it at all. Or were just trying to make me feel better about my voice instead of validating me.
In my understanding they are trying to comfort you but since they niether understand how it works nor the depth to which it goes their efforts fall short and they don't take it too seriously.
It's almost like the way parents treat their children's concerns. At best it's a half serious token thing. Although maybe this is not how you see it.
No I think that's a pretty good assessment of the situation. Thank you summing it up like that helps me understand it better.
Do I have some kind of projected dysphoria? I felt that every interaction felt fake and hollow and understood I was talking to fake and hollow people.