I'm doing research and development for an even smaller world's smallest violin, it's not done yet but they're welcome to pre-order it

Spending decades planning, building, and finishing a chicken coop and then getting mad that chickens are roosting in it

This is more of a 50 year self own that's finally coming to fruition

Don't worry, it's historically accurate because they're white europeans

Ladies and gentlemen, have you heard about Gran-Gran? Sweet lady, but they're saying she's too powerful. They're even saying they're gonna ban her. Honestly, I support it. Blue decks? Not my style. The Democrats want you to pay extra mana on every single spell, I can't stand it.

We now know that Prohibition is bad policy, but people don't think about how bad the alcohol problem was that the Temperance Movement managed to get it into the Constitution.

The selling point is supposed to be that it's really strong but tastes weak, or even barely acloholic.

Many people are saying it's like a drug! They call it "cardboard crack"! Very nasty stuff. I might have to do something about Wizards of the Scam, folks.

Even in the context of the Iran War, Trump hasn't cleared Bush yet

Conversation? You mean The Devil's Commandments?

The USS Lincoln is facing a fresh wave of suicide attempts upon learning they're headed for San Diego.

Merkavah is specifically a kind of Jewish mysticism.