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Bar is that low, huh?
(thelemmy.club)
Join the army, see the world, meet interesting people, kill them
Join the army, ~~see the world, meet interesting people, kill them~~ clean toilets for 4 years.
Soooooo, at what day do you get your own grenades?
Sooner than you'd think.
And they'll remove the shipping pin for you before handing it over.
I only need one
I actually wanted to join the military fresh out of high school but I was informed by my recruiter that they don't take autistic people
Well that's a damn lie but hey, bullets dodged
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It's a loss to their logistics supply corps.
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So you have a heartbeat? Please meet me outside
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That reply alone should’ve been the end of the conversation 😭
I hated the recruitment texts and calls. The high school and university apparently just give your information to recruiters.
Wait, this a real thing? That's so... American I guess.
Yep. It's actually the whole reason we have phy ed.
Basically if you get federal funds, you have to do what the federal says.
I see, I always assumed it was either people giving their info themselves or others did to prank you. I guess it makes sense for a country who loves perpetual war.
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one of them tried to corner me into agreeing to let him come pick me up and talk in person. probably because he felt it would make me more compliant if alone with him. like a child predator.
maybe one of the best things to say in these cases is "i don't suck dick, i bite"
like it gets a certain point across just fine. namely that if they try to intimidate you that's not gonna go good for them.
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in Russia, they agitate during their studies, promising a diploma) I can already see how such a person who has received a diploma in this way will work well in education.
"so i understand you take men in your military. did you have to be born that way?" got them to stop calling me altogether back during DADT.
I told them I was a conscientious objector in 2001 and never heard from any of them ever again.
when "I am not going to join, please stop calling" doesn't work, you have to know the actual magic words.
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Oldest child was contacted via text by a recruiter. We told them to waste their time. Say "yes, I'll talk to you about it if you treat ME to a meal at [local restaurant]." (emphasis mine)
The recruiter ghosted them after that.
We had an army recruiter come talk to our history class in high school (this was in the '80s). After the guy's talk he said "any questions"?" My friend Rob said "yeah, I have a question: does napalm still stick to kids?"
Ironically that's a good recruiter. Anything that looks like fraternizing with potential recruits outside official activities is a huge no no.
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"Have you considered applying for ICE?"
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Do military recruiters actually just cold call (well, text) you like that in the US?
Yes, and of course they're allowed to lie to children as well
The Army came to my highschool my senior year and put on an exhibition. They had Humvees and APCs and a massive wall of speakers that would make a passerby deaf at 40 yards. You were able to get out of class if you went to the event and listened to their pitch. I was one of like 4 kids who didn't go. Parents weren't told about this in advance, and there were recruiters there with pens waiting.
TBF, my school did have JROTC program but still... I think thats what set off my long history of being anti-that.
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"I mean, I wanna—I wanna kill. Kill. I wan—I wanna see, I wanna see blood and gore and guts and veins in my teeth. Eat dead burnt bodies. I mean kill. Kill. Kill! Kill!" And I started jumpin' up and down yelling, "Kill! Kill!" and he started jumpin' up and down with me and we was both jumpin' up and down yelling, "Kill! Kill!" And the sergeant came over, pinned a medal on me, sent me down the hall, and said, "You're our boy." Didn't feel too good about it.
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The bar has been low for at least 30 years. Marine recruiter wouldn't leave me alone even after I started hitting on him.
If you'd have joined then you'd realize your mistake. They just assumed you already had the same sense of humor somehow.
It was during DADT and I wasn't joking. Though since then I have met more gay marines than any other branch (I guess if you want to prove your manliness to the world...).
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The bar has been low for at least 30 years.
It was comically easy to get enlisted during Korea if you were under 18. You could just walk up to the office and lie. They'd take you.
I assume everyone has heard the Arlo Guthrie thanksgiving song. "I wanna kill, kill, kill, kill!" "You're our boy."
I bet b he’s good buddies with SSG Leaudrag.
Is that Barbados Slim?
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Our bestest ally and only democracy in the Middle East needs wall lickers to usher in their bizarre delusions.
Want to know more?
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this post was submitted on 18 Mar 2026
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