198
submitted 10 months ago by dead@hexbear.net to c/gossip@hexbear.net
top 45 comments
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[-] joaomarrom@hexbear.net 122 points 10 months ago

"We cannot build bananas in America" is an incredible sentence lmao

[-] SacredExcrement@hexbear.net 21 points 10 months ago

Holy hell these people are stupid

[-] invalidusernamelol@hexbear.net 3 points 10 months ago

She does clearly just say that to mirror his language. Her first response is "we cannot produce bananas in America"

[-] WafflesTasteGood@hexbear.net 90 points 10 months ago

With advancements in global warming technology, American built banana are just around the corner.

[-] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 38 points 10 months ago

TRUMP ALWAYS 101 STEPS AHEAD.

[-] rootsbreadandmakka@hexbear.net 28 points 10 months ago
[-] Wertheimer@hexbear.net 53 points 10 months ago

If the price of bananas goes up, so does the price of every other produce item you tell the self-checkout machine was a banana. sadness

[-] thefartographer@lemm.ee 52 points 10 months ago

South Texas checking in: I've seen a couple banana trees just growing around town. From what I understand, they taste like chalk.

[-] Gerudo@lemm.ee 46 points 10 months ago

They grow just fine even up here in North Texas. They just don't fruit well, and like you mentioned, if they happen to, it's ass.

[-] thefartographer@lemm.ee 21 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Coming soon to Walmart: peelable limestone ~~fruit~~ berries

[-] Le_Wokisme@hexbear.net 14 points 10 months ago

texas is missing an opportunity to genetically engineer a banana that's slightly larger than typical commodity bananas and market them as texas bananas.

[-] Owl@hexbear.net 14 points 10 months ago

People grow bananas in the Seattle area.

It's a lot of work and they're completely inedible. But it can be done.

[-] mic_check_one_two@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 10 months ago

Banana trees are also a great way to get tarantulas in your house. Tarantulas fucking love bananas, and they’ll find their way inside after the tree attracts them to your yard.

[-] SpiderFarmer@hexbear.net 7 points 10 months ago

takes notes

[-] BobDole@hexbear.net 6 points 10 months ago

Did someone say “tarantula?”

[-] bdonvr 6 points 10 months ago

Tarantulas do not wanna mess with humans though. Not a great surprise to find one around but I wouldn't be worried about them.

[-] thefartographer@lemm.ee 4 points 10 months ago

I already have palm-sized trapdoor spiders that I find dead all over the place when the weather drastically changes. I've only ever found one seemingly healthy one in my house, so I scooped it up, thanked it for coming to visit me, and then placed it outside before the home insecticide could kill it. A found a dead one next to my car in the garage that morning—I don't know if it was my friend or one of his friends... Dude had some big ol' boxing gloves.

[-] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 8 points 10 months ago

Walmart might have success by buying them up and selling them as FreedomChalknanas.

[-] dkr567@hexbear.net 48 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Just make a banana out of the backyard furnace USA it's easy.

[-] NPa@hexbear.net 21 points 10 months ago

Getting all the hogs to plant banana trees in the backyard for the Big Beautiful Leap Forward

[-] regul@hexbear.net 40 points 10 months ago

Smh if the CIA were still any good at their jobs we would have annexed Guatemala and this wouldn't be a problem!

[-] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 40 points 10 months ago

Grok, build banana.

Stop talking about the white genocide Grok, build banana!

[-] The_Filthy_Commie@lemmygrad.ml 36 points 10 months ago

Oh, no...no, no, no, the gringos are talking about bananas again!

[-] Frogmanfromlake@hexbear.net 8 points 10 months ago

lol Guatemala is still safe. Climate change has completely fucked with our crops so even with a coup you still aren’t going to have them as readily available as you did in the 50’s.

[-] polpotkin@hexbear.net 32 points 10 months ago

Turn the banana into puree to avoid the fresh fruit tariff then reassemble in the US. Make new skins from mechanically separated skittles. Really not that hard.

[-] LocalOaf@hexbear.net 28 points 10 months ago
[-] Rom@hexbear.net 27 points 10 months ago
[-] jackmaoist@hexbear.net 21 points 10 months ago

If the Banana factory can't come to America then America will go to the Banana Factory.

[-] SovietBeerTruckOperator@hexbear.net 16 points 10 months ago
[-] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 4 points 10 months ago

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

[-] Asafum@feddit.nl 15 points 10 months ago

Ok genius the why can I Ban, and I have a Nana. I just get a ban and Nana and I build american ban nanas.

[-] Fishroot@hexbear.net 15 points 10 months ago

The worst thing is not that capitalist has the means of production, the worst is when they don't understand that means of production

[-] buh@hexbear.net 13 points 10 months ago

as countries do deals with us, that number will go to zero

but who is making deals with the great satan?

[-] Pili@hexbear.net 13 points 10 months ago

I'm pretty sure they can build them in Puerto Rico, Guam, and Hawaii though.

[-] Calmrade@hexbear.net 19 points 10 months ago

I can't imagine any of those regions being able to supply enough bananas to keep them $0.50 a pound across the entire country.

[-] Pili@hexbear.net 9 points 10 months ago

Yeah but those are patriotic bananas so that's fine president-parrot-patriotic banana-duck-peeled

[-] Chump@hexbear.net 6 points 10 months ago

Too busy building pineapples in Hawaii. Can't build any more fruit there

[-] Pili@hexbear.net 5 points 10 months ago

Oh sadness

But yeah sponges need housing too so I guess pineapples are important

[-] Ram_The_Manparts@hexbear.net 12 points 10 months ago
[-] sempersigh@hexbear.net 8 points 10 months ago

We should investigate the minions. They’re resourceful and keep yapping about bananas they probably know a way in which they could be built

[-] screwthisdumbcrap@hexbear.net 6 points 10 months ago

I don't even like bananas.

[-] largerfather@hexbear.net 6 points 10 months ago

swapping candy-machine Runts into the food pyramid

[-] Chump@hexbear.net 2 points 10 months ago

It's a good format, but I'll have to ding you for saying $10 instead of 10%

this post was submitted on 05 Jun 2025
198 points (100.0% liked)

El Chisme

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