1
450

Look, I get it. The gargantuan shit-show that is U.S. politics and the American descent into fascism is on everyone's minds. It's certainly on mine.

But the point of this community is to highlight weird news stories that make you go, "By golly, I thought I was reading a headline from The Onion. You know, America's finest news source." A lot of stories being posted lately don't even remotely fit that.

That doesn't mean political stories aren't allowed here, but they must have headlines that would make people pause and wonder if it's a story from The Onion. Straight up regular, non Onion-y headlines don't fit.

2
34
submitted 57 minutes ago by RockBottom@feddit.org to c/nottheonion@lemmy.world

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/47932261

Fuck you Abbot and the horse you ride on.

3
89
4
63

Russia on Wednesday lifted restrictions on popular children’s gaming platform Roblox, saying the company “has fully complied with Russian legal requirements aimed at ensuring user safety.” “The company has implemented a range of additional child-protection measures,” the Digital Development, Communications and Mass Media Ministry said in a statement. “Roblox pledged to continue efforts to combat the spread of undesirable content on the platform,” the ministry said.

5
12

cross-posted from: https://news.abolish.capital/post/56230

The first published live observations of the rare goblin shark (Mitsukurina owstoni) in its natural deep-ocean habitat were reported in a new paper by a University of Hawai'i at Mānoa-led team of oceanographers. In the past, goblin sharks were filmed and reported alive only after being hooked on a fishing line and hauled to the surface, where divers could observe them and where they soon died. The new study, published in Journal of Fish Biology, documents two live observations of one of the most elusive yet iconic sharks on the planet—one at a seamount near Jarvis Island and another on the slope of the Tonga Trench.


From Biology News - Evolution, Cell theory, Gene theory, Microbiology, Biotechnology via This RSS Feed.

6
50
7
153
submitted 14 hours ago by beep@piefed.world to c/nottheonion@lemmy.world
8
143
submitted 22 hours ago by sundray@lemmus.org to c/nottheonion@lemmy.world
9
89
10
677
11
109
12
45
13
101

"MILF magnet" is what they called me back in college.

14
113

Also not the Bloomin' Onion.

15
195
16
154
17
248

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/47886949

Mormon leaders, military veterans and elected officials reacted with anger to a new Department of Defense policy that does not consider The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to be a Christian religion as part of a wider effort to cut down the U.S. military’s list of recognized faiths.

“The Pentagon’s decision to list The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints apart from other Christian faiths is wrong and needs to be corrected,” Republican Rep. Mike Kennedy, of heavily Mormon Utah, wrote on X on Sunday.

18
399
19
347
20
308

In its long-awaited artificial intelligence strategy released Thursday, the Carney government said it will “strengthen its privacy laws to ensure that Canadians’ personal information is not used inappropriately, including for surveillance pricing.” Government officials did not give further details or clarify when asked if that will be an outright ban on the practice.

21
37
22
23
23
20
24
149
25
114
view more: next ›

Not The Onion

21696 readers
656 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, ableist, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS