Silence isn't a crime you know...it's actually pretty great.
That sounds great, actually
Asking someone you love "How was your day?" is a meaningful question. Small talk is bullshit time wasting between randos or acquaintances.
Is or is not talking about how your days went considered small talk? I literally don't know now. I'd say it's small talk.
Small talk is a way to gauge someone's mood before going for the bigger discussions
If a colleague asks me "Hi, how're you doing?" it's small talk and I'll respond something like "Oh you know, the usual." If my partner asks me "Hi, how was your day?" it's a genuine question and I will respond "That fucking dickhead at work that always plays nice and personable came around with another set of "urgent" requests and no fucking clue what he's actually asking for, whether it's possible or why I told him last week it isn't."
The difference is in how serious I take the question.
I think so? Perhaps it's small talk as long as it remains small. "Hi honey, what did you find out about the coefficient of friction in the graviton chamber after interviewing that nazi scientist, and does it mean we have to uproot our family and travel to a new country again?" is probably not small talk, unless it's answered by, "oh, yeah, friction's quite big, it's all fine; can I have some toast?"
after you get through all the asking each other stuff to get to know each other's histories etc phase, it's okay to just not talk all the time
So, you just HAVE to talk?
Do you hate silence?
One of the things Ford Prefect had always found hardest to understand about humans was their habit of continually stating the obvious... At first Ford formed a theory to account for this human behaviour. If human beings don't keep exercising their lips, he thought, their mouths seize up. After a few months' consideration and observation he abandoned this theory in favour of a new one. If they don't keep on excercising their lips, he thought, their brains start working.
One of my favorite passages from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.
I REFRAIN FROM THE PRACTICE OF UTILIZING MINISCULE SPEECH. EACH AND EVERY INSTANCE OF MY EXPRESSION IS VAST AND VERBOSE AND MAXIMAL.
ITT we ask the autistic to self identify
Not spelled like that, no.
Daily life is what daily life is all about.
I do think I'd potentially be happier with a partner who I could speak philosophy and politics with, but if we couldn't also function simply navigating running a household and raising our family, then we really couldn't be anything more than friends with benefits long term. Not that that would be a bad thing. It just depends on how you want to live your life, and whether you value a stable partnership over firey romance.
Some people are lucky enough to have a partner that fulfills the entirety of their intellectual, intimate, familial and financial needs, but such people are few and far between I'm sure!
I do exactly this ! Hi honey how was your day ? Kids were restless ? Ok. Does that affect your stance on education through play ? is punishment sometimes advisable ? you haven't read your copy of Foucault's Discipl.... hey where are you going ?... baby ??
No I think not. But the feeling of freewill do exist and seems universal. So if we have a fact based approach, it does not change much. I think there it a lot of proof that freewill is at least very weak compare to social determinism.
got a neighbor can't control his motor mouth. last time he came to my door i said 'what the fuck do you want' and closed/locked the door. not too bright. he yelled through the door, 'I only want to talk'. hahaha fuck off
Tough one. I'd probably end up being the person who just kept politely listening while trying to shut down the conversation amicably like "well anyway" and "I must get cooking dinner now" and "my plants need moisturising" or something.
Neighbours are extremely high on the list of people I want to avoid pissing off, because a neighbour with a grudge against you could be an absolute nightmare (especially when you live in a townhouse and share walls)
let him in once. talked non-stop for nearly 2 hours. unstable. out. used to be normalish. lost his mind.
Like yeah, exactly. With the right person, you can talk for hours and hours about all kinds of stuff that interests you.
with the right person you can also be quiet with for hours
Nope. Free will is an illusion that we have because we live in a world that's too complex to predict. We are a product of our circumstance.
No, we just stfu when we don't have anything interesting to talk about. It's not complicated.
how do people who like small talk plan on being in sustained meaningful relationships what are you gonna do "hi honey nice weather we're having huh?"
my plan is to be too busy kissing my partner at all times to say anything
How Shakespearian. "Stop his mouth with a kiss."
"And another kiss."
"Keep going! More kisses, least he open his mouth and opine on the weather."
a year in the horror dawns upon you
you have trained your partner to engage in small talk to get kissed
My wife and I will sit in the same room for hours and never speak a word to each other. We only talk when we have something to say, and we're both happy with that relationship. My sister thinks we're crazy, but we like it quiet.
Spouse and I ponder the mysteries of life and the universe while we’re cuddling.
My partner and I have surprisingly little in common when it comes to interests. I like a lot of nerd stuff: homelab, 3d printing, robotics, brewing, welding, woodworking, sci-fi, etc. They like not nerd stuff: copaganda shows, murder porn (podcasts and documentaries), dog training, cooking, etc. I like metal, they like jangly indie, we both like punk. We both really love cats.
We also both hate small talk, so we only discuss what we find to be pertinent or interesting. Since we have a lot of individual interests, we actually have a lot to talk about. We just had a really great conversation on using Docker or a VM to circumvent some silly online testing issues. Otherwise, it's just comfortable silence. I really love them.
Why does the image look like AI generated? How the letters are so fucked up?
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
