this post was submitted on 16 Apr 2025
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[–] [email protected] 54 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

He means that you can use a Cybertruck to travel to 1970s South Africa

[–] [email protected] 24 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

All you need to do is hit 88 mph

[–] [email protected] 17 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

They tried for that but it kept catching fire so they settled for 1488 meters per hour

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 weeks ago

They tried for that but it kept catching fire

So it was getting close to the superior german WW2 tanks design

[–] [email protected] 39 points 4 weeks ago

This reminds me of how in the Command and Conquer: Red Alert series, the fact that Einstein develops weapons to kill Soviets is incredibly ironic if you know anything at all about the actual Einstein

[–] [email protected] 34 points 4 weeks ago (2 children)

Juche Necromancy vs Capitalist Chronomancy

[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 weeks ago

We all know who will win in that fight kim-blood

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 weeks ago

Not content with aping the Tiberium saga through climate change, reality decided we needed the endless campy war of Red Alert as well.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

Supreme Leader Trump Donald is said to be able to single-handedly annihilate distance, cause things to grow, and improve productivity.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

oh, and he has time travel powers

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 weeks ago

Folks, you won't believe it. They invented the past! Everyone was always saying that there is just the present. Great!

[–] [email protected] 20 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

Our technologies permit us to manipulate time and space. They leave distance annihilated, cause things to grow, and improve productivity.

Great copypasta!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 weeks ago

Site tagline material

[–] [email protected] 19 points 4 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 19 points 4 weeks ago

object class: burger

[–] [email protected] 18 points 4 weeks ago

Our plan is to accelerate the rest of the world to relativistic speeds so the US passes centuries of technological development in an instant and is prepared for global domination once it resynchronizes.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 4 weeks ago

Kratsios is a Thiel guy, maybe he accidentally revealed too much here.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 4 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 16 points 4 weeks ago

Let them cook

[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 13 points 4 weeks ago

Oh shit, Trump's got his hands on Dialga and Palkia!

[–] [email protected] 13 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

"Trazyn is responsible for this, somehow."

[–] [email protected] 13 points 4 weeks ago (2 children)

Trump finally building the Stargate

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 weeks ago

We're making tremendous deals with the Goa'uld, loser Jack ONeill can't even imagine what they've given us already

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

But that back in your mouth.

Startgate deserves better than that!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

Stargate is a show that i can't watch anymore after becoming communist. Basically every episode i laugh "no chance US would do that" at a surprising lack of imperialism and incredibly naive belief in the justice and universality of US judiciary system, especially striking for members of US armed forces and intelligence services.

Also the show is basically grimdark, Goa'uld parasitic theocracy gets replaced with US space imperialism.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 weeks ago

You're not wrong

[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 weeks ago

I never expected to be governed by a dr. bronner's container and yet here we are

[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 weeks ago

100% true and fact-checked by 1000% real patriots (red blue and white!)

Trump's presidency feels like 6 years already but according to unconfirmed and false rumors, it has only been 3 months. He can bend time.

According to his doctor, god-emperor Trump also grew an inch sometimes in the last 4 years. He can bend space.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 weeks ago

manipulating time and space is not only chronomancy but also teleportation

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 weeks ago

Playin red alert 2 as the allies be like