242
Anon is no angle (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 1 year ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

>be me
>lifting in the garage
>mom walks in with a plate of tendies with chinese sauce
>always told mom to not to come to the garage while I lifted
>always told mom to never look me in my eyes while I lifted (its where my demons hide)
>she made eye contact
>the plate fell from her hands
>the young man she had been raising had turned into a FUCKED UP beast
>she covers her mouth with both her hands as she lets out a yelp
>turns around and runs away
>put the rusty barbell down
>calmly walk up to the mirror and smash it as I see the beast too
Gosh dang it /fit/, we were gonna go shopping this weekend. What do I do now?

all 42 comments
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[-] [email protected] 62 points 1 year ago

I can't say if this is satire.

[-] [email protected] 43 points 1 year ago
[-] [email protected] 74 points 1 year ago

A sauce of Chinese origin one would assume

[-] [email protected] 54 points 1 year ago

As one might get with a succulent Chinese meal? At McDonald's???

[-] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago

Localised entirely in your kitchen?!?

[-] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

And my axe!

[-] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Ah yes. I see you know your Judo well.

[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

UNHAND MY PENIS!

[-] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

Szechuan sauce. Subtle Rick and Morty reference implying he's a neck beard fanatic.

[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Do they even make Szechuan sauce anymore though? Are people on 4Chan just reposting their own stories now or did McDonald's just give him old rancid sauces?

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I always assume it's an old meme being reposted on Lemmy.

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

The date says 3/1/24

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

It's one of the McD standard sauces you can get with chicken nuggets : BBQ, curry or Chinese.

[-] [email protected] 27 points 1 year ago

Theres only one option now, Anon. Pick that bar back up.

[-] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

And put it down. And then pick it up again.

[-] [email protected] 26 points 1 year ago
[-] [email protected] 29 points 1 year ago

Anon is telling a satirical story about how primal and intimidating they are now that they lift weights.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

It sounds like a scene from Teen Wolf.

[-] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Is it...actual satire though? Or does homie actually think that way?

[-] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago

I take it you don’t lift. It can be difficult for the untapped to understand our mindset. Me btw

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago
[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I bow to your...unquestionable experience lmao

[-] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago
[-] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

I’m pretty sure you’re already aware but there have been issues with kbin lately. I didn’t realize it was “2 days to federate a reply” bad, but that’s how she be.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

That means you're mostly normal. Shh, bby. It's ok

[-] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago

He might not be an angle, but he sure is acute!

[-] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago

How can you say he is no angle when he's clearly being obtuse.

[-] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago
[-] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

John Demonsoul, That's what we used to call him.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Wow that's a throwback

[-] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago

How bout you not lift in the nude, anon?

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago
[-] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Please do... how?

[-] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Woah he is strongh enough to cut me through the internet.

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago
this post was submitted on 04 Mar 2024
242 points (89.3% liked)

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