this post was submitted on 11 Feb 2024
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Memes

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[–] BeardedSingleMalt@kbin.social 129 points 1 year ago (9 children)
  • All the workers have forearm tattoos

  • At least 3 people are wearing beanies in the middle of summer

  • Bacon is $4 extra

  • The burger comes out on a bun drenched in butter and is so greasy/oily that halfway through it may as well have been served in a bowl

[–] altima_neo@lemmy.zip 37 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's also a dry pretzel bun

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[–] Nacktmull@lemmy.world 20 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Also:

  • The waiter has a twirled moustache and wears a mesh shirt combined with a bowler hat
  • The $4 extra bacon is burned to charcoal strips
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[–] Nfamwap@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago

Drinks are served in jars, and your fries, well, you get 8 fries in a rusty old can.

The place is being run by 3 bearded lumbersexuals in flannel and ball caps having the time of their lives and a chick in overalls and her hair in a bandanna who could not be more over it.

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[–] A7thStone@lemmy.world 75 points 1 year ago (8 children)

I hate those fucking stools. I swear they were invented to be so uncomfortable that once you've choked down that mediocre overpriced burger you want to leave as soon as possible because your ass hurts.

[–] PoolloverNathan@programming.dev 32 points 1 year ago

Getting people to leave quickly allows more people to enter, which means more burgers served.

[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 18 points 1 year ago (8 children)

always order everything to go and take it home and eat it in the comfort of my own bed.

restaurants are so uncomfortable.

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[–] Sanctus@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

They're shitty amazon order stools I bet.

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[–] MentalEdge@sopuli.xyz 56 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Why is this so accurate

Half of the "artisan" burger chains in my city are marginally better than a fast-food chain. One, maybe two of them make burgers so good that they're worth the occasional splurge.

[–] NegativeLookBehind@kbin.social 46 points 1 year ago (3 children)

There’s a BBQ place near me, and I ordered tater tots there once, as a side. They were $4. They literally gave me 4 tater tots. They were one dollar apiece.

[–] Sabre363@sh.itjust.works 18 points 1 year ago (1 children)

There are two types of BBQ places; stingy, overpriced, gourmet bullshit with barely any sauce and greasy, messy, heart stopping heaven. The former always pretends to be the latter.

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

There's also Mission BBQ which is stingy, overpriced, overly-sweet non-gourmet bullshit with jingoistic pro-military support-the-troops bullshit thrown in for good measure.

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[–] Sekrayray@lemmy.world 38 points 1 year ago (10 children)

This meme is either very old or was made by someone in the midwestern US (always years behind on fads).

All of the bistro burger joints have gone the way of the dinosaur in my neck of the woods. Now it’s all smash burger fast food knock offs.

[–] Magzmak@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Nah, I got take out 3 burgers in SF area for 60 bucks in a place that looked like this and offered 6$ fries. Wtf

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[–] Death_Equity@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

Taphouse/brewery has replaced the bistro burger joints that couldn't survive covid.

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[–] phoneymouse@lemmy.world 29 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

They serve “local IPA” on draft for $11 or, ironically, a miller high life for a dollar.

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[–] pythonoob@programming.dev 27 points 1 year ago

Holy shit his is accurate, wtf lol

[–] ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world 27 points 1 year ago (4 children)

I literally just opened a place like this lmao

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 18 points 1 year ago (16 children)

Good luck, honestly.

$22.50 is a lot for a burger, but I've had some burgers that price that are life changing.

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[–] madcaesar@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago
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[–] scytale@lemm.ee 25 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Also serving it on anything but a plate.

[–] phoneymouse@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

!wewantplates@midwest.social

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[–] foggy@lemmy.world 25 points 1 year ago (5 children)

Cheese:

American $1

Cheddar $2

Smoked Gouda $3

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[–] RHOPKINS13@kbin.social 25 points 1 year ago (8 children)

To be fair, Five Guys is every bit as expensive. But I'll take Five Guys over most of those places anyway. Free peanuts is tempting.

[–] Toneswirly@lemmy.world 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Five guys will let you fuck your burger up with 12 toppings tho. Better value proposition

[–] WetBeardHairs@lemmy.ml 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Five guys will let you fuck your burger

This echos my last five guys in restaurant people watching experience.

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Denim aprons denim aprons denim aprons

[–] cmhickman358 16 points 1 year ago

And the word "Offerings" will appear on the menu

[–] clericc@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago (4 children)

We have this exact hanging lamp at home from Amazon lol

[–] kautau@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Death_Equity@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago

One bussy and penetrative cuddling.

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[–] malachai@pawb.social 11 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Pffftahahaha, I think I've been to this restaurant. I probably looked at the menu, eyes bugged out of head, ordered a cider or something and left.

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[–] DoctorWhookah@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 year ago

This is incredibly accurate.

[–] gobills@lemm.ee 8 points 1 year ago

Holy shit even the pictures look like a local restaurant named: Allentown Burger Venture (ABV) lol

[–] Leviathan@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago (6 children)

I've never seen a burger come without some side at a non fast-food restaurant in my city and I don't know why I find the concept so gross.

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[–] RisingSwell@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Yeah I've had a burger from a place that roughly fit this description, I was really sad when they closed because it was by an extreme margin the best burger I've ever had in my life.

Life is significantly worse without that burger.

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[–] Truck_kun@beehaw.org 7 points 1 year ago

Burger King has a new burger that I like, and it's $10 (burger only). I would order it lots if it was $7 to 8, but $10 is a tad much.

Eating out now days is just too expensive in general. If I'm going to eat out, I rather go to an actual restaurant, because fast food costs about the same now days. $14-16 fast food mean vs $12-22 for sit down meal. I can keep the fast food costs down, but that's usually without a meal, and/or ordering inferior products.

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