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Ahead of the curve (thelemmy.club)
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[-] darthsundhaft@piefed.social 18 points 1 day ago

Nah, he's not funny. He was a Trump supporter. Now he's dead,

[-] cdf12345@lemmy.zip 2 points 23 hours ago

I’ve found it hilarious

[-] diabetic_porcupine@lemmy.world 6 points 22 hours ago

God damnit we have to hate chuck Norris now too??

[-] wildbus8979@sh.itjust.works 86 points 1 day ago
[-] Atelopus-zeteki@fedia.io 41 points 1 day ago

FTG!
Chuck Norris Fact No. 39: "Chuck Norris stared evil in the eye and it went into hiding." America's favorite action star is doing just that this election -- calling on evangelical Christians across the nation to join him in crushing the creep of socialism under President Obama.

Norris and his wife, Gena, have filmed a public service announcement, unveiled exclusively at WND, wherein the two urge Christians to help save the country in November.

"We are here to talk about a growing concern we all share," Chuck Norris explains. "If we look to history, our great country and freedom are under attack. We're at a tipping point and, quite possibly, our country as we know it may be lost forever if we don't change the course in which our country is headed."

Gena warns that voter apathy among evangelicals in 2008 may have contributed to Obama's election in the first place.

"With our country at a crossroads, Chuck and I have asked ourselves what we can be doing to help support this great country we're blessed to live in and how we can encourage our like-minded American brothers and sisters to unite and let their voices be heard," she said. "It is estimated that in the 2008 election, 30 million evangelical Christians stayed home on voting day and Obama won the election by 10 million votes."

Chuck cautions Christians about the cost of doing nothing while the nation spirals into a state of socialism from which there will be no return.

"We know you love your family and your freedom as much as Gena and I do," he says in his appeal to Americans. "And it is because of that we can no longer sit quietly or stand on the sidelines and watch our country go the way of socialism or something much worse."

Gena urged Christians to register and cast their votes on Election Day to ensure "our voices will be heard."

Chuck recalled the cautionary words of great patriots on the subject of preserving liberty:

"As Edmund Burke said, 'All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men and women do nothing.'

"Our great president, Ronald Reagan said, 'Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction. We didn't pass it to our children in the bloodstream. It must be fought for, protected and handed on for them to do the same.'"

Likewise, Gena noted, "President Reagan went on to say that 'You and I have a rendezvous with destiny. We will preserve for our children this last best hope of man on earth, or we will sentence them to take the first step into a thousand years of darkness. If we fail, at least let our children and our children's children say of us we justified our brief moment here. We did all that could be done.'"

[-] OpenStars@piefed.social 17 points 1 day ago

So TLDR: Chuck Norris took on democracy, and won? 😳🤪

[-] Atelopus-zeteki@fedia.io 12 points 1 day ago

so sad, what a political weirdo. Let's assure Democracy wins, ultimately, now that Chuckles has been defeated by the forces of Life itself.

[-] OpenStars@piefed.social 2 points 1 day ago

That... seems unlikely at this point, but I strongly hope that I am wrong.

Like he said that he was going to take Venezuela, then he did it. And he said that he would bomb Iran, and then he did.

He also said that voting in places that did not vote correctly should have something done about that, so...

[-] Dogiedog64@lemmy.world 29 points 1 day ago

Chuck Norris is dead. Good.

[-] PrettyFlyForAFatGuy@feddit.uk 4 points 1 day ago
[-] Dogiedog64@lemmy.world 16 points 1 day ago

He was... and now he's dead :).

[-] GiantChickDicks@lemmy.ml 53 points 1 day ago
[-] vivalapivo@lemmy.today 21 points 1 day ago

What has the kid done to you

[-] TerHu@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 day ago

lots. for one example just refer to the other lengthy comment here

[-] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 day ago

That's talking about Chuck Norris, not the kid.

[-] TerHu@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 1 day ago

you’re right and i can’t read

[-] Kolanaki@pawb.social 14 points 1 day ago

"I was sober for 11 years straight."

"What happened?"

"I turned 12."

[-] Amir@lemmy.ml 4 points 21 hours ago

That implies he drank for a year as a baby, which explains why he became a Trump supporter.

[-] moakley@lemmy.world 17 points 1 day ago

This is an old Steven Wright joke. It's fine to steal it and use it on your young relatives, but stealing it and giving it to a bigot is kind of shitty.

Also it flows better without the "already". It's supposed to be punchy and absurd. Omit needless words.

[-] Hegar@fedia.io 26 points 1 day ago

He was a shitbag and he ruined barrens chat.

[-] Arcadeep@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

I miss the days when something like barrens chat could exist

[-] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 day ago

Where is Mankrik's wife???

[-] ZC3rr0r@piefed.ca 5 points 1 day ago

Now that brings back memories, old barrens chat was such an early 2000s meme-fest.

[-] Translucide@piefed.social 21 points 1 day ago
[-] Morose@lemmy.world 19 points 1 day ago

This is how I found out Chuck Norris died... RIP

[-] SuspiciousCatThing@pawb.social 43 points 1 day ago

No it's okay, he sucked.

[-] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 12 points 1 day ago

GR (Good Riddance)

[-] IcedRaktajino@startrek.website 7 points 1 day ago

Chuck Norris never dies. He just waits.

[-] lichtmetzger@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 1 day ago

He only lost the first of his 99 lives.

[-] Grabthar@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

He didn't die. He's been training the last few weeks. The fight with Death waa scheduled for today, where he can try for a best two out of three challenge. Odds favour him getting four wins.

[-] RaoulDook@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago

Poor kid had AIDS too

[-] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago

But why does Haley Joel Osment have AIDS?

[-] RaoulDook@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

Raped by one of the Trump-Epstein group, poor kid.

[-] kkj@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Must be Korean!

this post was submitted on 20 Mar 2026
545 points (89.7% liked)

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