Ask them out the next day? Did everybody forget to function as human beings while I was away?

You can create accounts on funny websites in their name

Serious answer: depends on what you're into and what you're looking for.

I've been married a while and I still send my wife memes. Sharing random jokes we found on the internet makes up a big part of our messaging thread, in addition to normal topics of communication (whether we want to go to a thing, what time we'll likely get home from work, what do we want for dinner, can you check to see if we have enough cheese to make this thing I want to make, you won't believe what this asshole said to me at work, etc.).

But the memes are still a big part of our communication, after pretty much starting that way. Our early texts were both coordination of in-person dates, and funny things that made each other laugh.

The handful of relationships I had that started in the smartphone era basically followed that pattern. There were some duds that fizzled out between getting a number and not ever making it to a date, but I don't think I'd want to be with someone who didn't enjoy my communication style. Which, again, is heavily meme based.

You just add it to the list of other such numbers, I don't think you're supposed to do anything with them. They're probably used as random seeds or something.

Nah, that could easily have a landed as a joke instead of a brain fart. And being funny is about 80-90% as good as being physically attractive.

Except, you know, attractiveness is subjective, and heavily influenced by your personality

Don't sell yourself short

Being ugly is also easy if you only date ugly people.

Fair enough, I should not assume anyway.

Plants are actually kind of easy. If you want to try again:

• Choose the right plants. Yes, some plants are hard to keep and need specific environments. Avoid those, other plants are able to grow on a parking lot in the summer
• Some plants need direct sunlight, others like the shade. Some plants need a lot of water, others not. This is written on this little cardboard thingy when you buy them

Yeah, and that's it. Buy plants that don't need much maintenance and you're fine. Maybe set a reminder to water them.

I figured, I'd get one of those standard issue succulents, because they're supposed to be easy to care for, and now it decided to grow a 30 cm stalk, when the rest of the plant is just 5 cm tall.

Like, what the hell, dude. Am I supposed to cut it off? I don't even know what kind of succulent it is, so I can't look it up either. I've just been letting it grow and hoping that it doesn't entwine my whole place. 🫠