Sorta sick of hearing about this tbh. I’ve seen everyone reporting on this damn egg heist, like international papers even. Our hospitals are overflowing, massive numbers of schools having to close, due to one of the worst flu seasons and respiratory illness seasons in years. Kansas has the worst tuberculosis outbreak in a century. And of course there’s the bird flu news that gets worse by the day. And in terms of eggs, how about the price gouging going on? No let’s get all up in arms about people stealing (admittedly a ton) of eggs because of white suburbanites’ identification with the ownership class and their constant obsession with “crime.” Good for these people. I hope they get away and go on to steal even more eggs.

Moving 100k eggs before they expire is crazy too, really hope they Robin Hooded them to like every local food bank and stuff

Cops are scrambling, they thought this case would be over easy. They'll need a hard-boiled detective to crack it open. Hopefully the cops will fuck up and then they'll really have egg on their face

violent eggstremist

Brad Pitt eating in every scene he's in, but he's just biting into a raw egg each time

Maoists guerillas cracking up another monopoly, right in the yolk of the empire.

Oceans One Dozen: Grade A Large

They were stealing crabs in the area last year. Food trucks get jacked in PA constantly lol, whatever can be flipped

This is up there with the great avocado heist

InflationIsntRealMeme.jpg

Lex Luthor moving onto a keto diet be like:

I heard about this in Boonta Vista's Big Egg segment. They really are the premier small news podcast.

How do the reporters on this case NOT just put a whole bunch of egg puns all over the articles?

Honestly you could probably make good money selling people those eggs at a normal price rn

The police are scrambling to crack this mystery. These eggs have been poached to be hidden where the sunny-side-up don't shine. Where the devil could they be? This certainly won't be over-easy for them to find. When they make a movie adaptation of this, I think they should cast Benedict Cumberbatch.

Has anyone heard from stephan molyneux lately?