this post was submitted on 05 Nov 2024
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Microblog Memes

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[–] [email protected] 173 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Boggles the mind to think stepmoms will prevent WW3.

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[–] [email protected] 133 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Imagine being an adult raised without all-you-can-stomach porn and suddenly getting access to the Internet.

SO. MANY. BLISTERS.

[–] [email protected] 76 points 1 month ago (4 children)

" I can't fire my rifle! My hand is cramped up!"

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 month ago (3 children)

My "pistol" is out of ammo!

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

This is my rifle. This is my gun. This is for shooting. This is for fun.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

I'm shooting blanks!

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I'm leaving, hot babes 3 km to the north!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

You hear that, boys? Move, move, move!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

Fapping to save lives

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 month ago (5 children)

Those of us who grew up before the internet have experienced that.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 month ago (1 children)

We had a couple decades of slow acclimatization: crappy black and white scans, weird CGA scans, glorious 16 colors, all of which had to be painstakingly downloaded at 2400 baud or less, then finally lifelike 256 color images. And then tiny gifs or videos that would take all night. In the semi modern era, there was crappy filesharing where you could type search strings in and hope for the best (and enough seeds).

But these poor bastards are going from zero straight to pornhub.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

"Glorious leader was right, the west is depraved! Still not putting phone down though."

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Wait until they find the Japanese sites.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Eh, y'all got that pornography sent to you 3 pixels at a time, that hardly counts as 'all you can stomach porn'. Waiting between each line of your image is barely equivalent to today's hard hitting porn problems such as videos buffering (though it's an amusing comparison now that I think about it).

A better comparison would be long term coma patients or people who've been in prison since the 90s.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (5 children)

Believe it or not, many of us grew up before you could even download porn slowly. The internet literally didn't exist. Then it existed but was slow and empty. Then it grew, and here we are now.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 month ago (2 children)

We found porn stashed in hedges and sheds, hidden in the woods, on playing cards, in the bottom of wardrobes. It was something you found rather than something you sought out.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (2 children)

It's true. Everyone who grew up in the early 90s or before has at least one story about finding porn in the woods, including myself.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

My first experience with internet porn was after trying to download Fight Club from a peer-to-peer filesharing app and ending up with something unexpected that was merely named 'Fight Club'.

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

And here you are, also not invading Ukraine.

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[–] [email protected] 116 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (5 children)

"You now have access to the collective knowledge of the entire world."

"Nah, let me see the boobies!"

[–] [email protected] 61 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That's where it starts. Then once they find Wikipedia, it'll be a game changer.

[–] [email protected] 49 points 1 month ago (3 children)

it might be the pessimist in me, or it might be the reality we're living in

but if sheer access to Wikipedia cured you out of being a cultist- i don't think there'd be that many trump supporters

[–] [email protected] 38 points 1 month ago (1 children)

My mom believes that Wikipedia is "influenced and censored." She didn't like Fargo when my uncle tricked her into watching it, so claimed that the Wikipedia article describing its awards (7 Oscar noms, 2 wins, etc.) were part of the demon-influenced liberal agenda.

So no, Wikipedia doesn't cure cultism.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

*facts don't cure...

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

There's a difference between a cultist living thru the growth of the Internet and social media. It's another when you have people completely cut off from the vast majority of the world and information for the last few decades.

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

A surprising amount of technological development is for pornography. Video-casettes won out because pornography used them over laserdisc or betamax.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I think you meant VHS won out. Betamax was also a video cassette format.

And yes, porn had a lot to do with why VHS won!

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

And secure online payments.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

As is tradition dating back to cave paintings.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

this is pretty much the most common response to AI as well

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

Well with ai your choice is deeply flawed knowledge from a system that can't recognise it's own mistakes or semi-convincing generated pictures. It does one of these significantly better.

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[–] [email protected] 67 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Do you think they'll fall victim to the ads since they've never experienced the internet before?

Hot chicks in your local Oblast, click here!!

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

The Russians have already been falling for it kind of, but then considering some of the reactions we saw from them at the start of the war to flushing toilets and the like, they might be new to this too..

[–] [email protected] 53 points 1 month ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 month ago (1 children)

"Unfettered" is a big word for the Russian internet.

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago

The milfs in their area may move them out of position

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You know, we really should have a world wide Fap For Peace day. Like those "Pray for [insert thing]" days you sometimes hear about people doing.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

This is amazing! Why haven't I heard of this and why isn't it a bigger deal. The world needs this more than ever!

Thank you for this!

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago (6 children)

Genuinely curious, what are they using to access the Internet? I'm struggling to believe they brought smartphones with them that are universally compatible with the cell networks? Do they have PCs in the barracks and the dudes are just huddled around having the time of their lives?

[–] [email protected] 39 points 1 month ago (2 children)

WiFi is a standard protocol. Russians are also clever with electronics. Gaining favor with the new guys is as easy as giving them an old phone. WiFi still works.

I don't think most people fighting for Russia are super indoctrinated on the Russian side; opportunistic, morally corrupt, maybe, but not super jaded. Even if you're fighting in dubious circumstances, the level of NK dystopian cult insanity is next level crazy. I can't picture anyone that is around those guys being totally passive about the extent of bowdlerization and disinformation present in NK. Like you've got a bigger humanitarian obligation to show those kids that they are living in The Hunger Games IRL.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

I am going to guess they have WiFi access points.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

One computer, many guys was how the world of porn was for a while. Printed shit off for "personal care" later.

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago

Next week after they discover American food

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)

We haven't ruled out the possibility of Dear Leader porn. Also have the state-approved stuff like Debbie Does DPRK, Backdoor Kim Sluts, Taepo-dong and Juche Bottom Babes.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

It's a sad day for Rule 34.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

When I read gorging on

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

I live in the free world and I gorge on pornopgraphy too. And food as well!

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