refuses to answer questions
dances for 30 minutes
wins election
Not gonna lie I assumed this was an Onion article
this post was submitted on 15 Oct 2024
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Booorn in the USA
This slaps. The difference between the candidates is pure vibes at this point. They might as well settle it with a dance-off.
Mia Wallace/Vincent Vega 2024
Trump is playing the hits I see.
He might’ve lost a step since 2016, but he hasn’t lost it. He’s still the president we Americans deserve 
He’s still the president we Americans deserve
Not USian but unironically this (though better is needed ofc). I was shocked when he won in 2016 but I must admit it was the most democratic thing that had ever happened in the US' nearing 250 years of ignoble history. He is basically the perfect, truest expression of what America is
yo he was mouthing along to "nothing compares to you" and pointing at his crowd.
fucking amazing.
he has unconditional love for anyone who loves him. hahahahaha.
edit: it turns out he has a "music man" that plays him music he like whenever he gets upset. I think he was giving himself the music man treatment after getting pissed at the fat hogs passing out at his event and disrupting it. lmfao.
That is a long time for someone his age to dance.
Maybe he's born with it. Maybe it's German Sudafed.
Maybe he's born with it. Maybe it's German Sudafed.
Powered by McDonalds™ 
This might be his last campaign, let him have a little fun
This is the electoral genius that the "adults in the room" can't come up with an answer to.
A bunch of wine-sipping tryhards that are performatively "adult" can't match the barbarian rizz of an untethered elderly baby.
I've laughed myself to crying several times reading "barbarian rizz of an untethered elderly baby" thank you
now this is a tagline folks
My theory is that he expected to get shot again and wanted to have some fitting music. Make it cinematic 
he's practicing his wiggling
The best to ever do it
I hope he did his hallmark jerking off two cocks dance move
Of course he did.
I need to request a trump two dicks dance emoji
think about it. can we really respect ourselves if we don't have this emoji
We used to be a website.
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He's won folks
To think Howard Dean sunk his campaign over an excited scream. If Trump wasn't the rizzler and our politics in 2024 wasn't insane this would go down in the record books of "shit that sunk a presidential bid."
The scream didn't sink the campaign, every single media outlet insisting that the scream sank his campaign, sank his campaign.
He was doing pretty well as the most progressive candidate. MSM had to scramble and come up with a reason to publish a thousand articles about how voters didn't think he was electable. Which made him unelectable.
Great example of tail wagging the dog and crazy how well it worked.
I supported him because he was for universal healthcare. Last time I checked he's a lobbyist specializing in preventing universal healthcare.
Many such cases.
he was for universal healthcare. Last time I checked he's a lobbyist specializing in preventing universal healthcare
That's So Democrat
Not to carry water for some liberal ghoul but the entire country abondoning you because the media performed an obvious hatchet job amputation on your campaign would probablly be a pretty strong motivator for anybody to say "fuck these stupid asshole if this is the thanks i get for helping them I just wanna know who's gonna sign the biggest check possible for me"
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Isn't Trump kinda the one to bring that about tho? Idk much about howard dean, but I assume he was at least somewhat respected as a politician beforehand. With that scream, in a kind of patriarchical society creating a mythos of education and prestige around politicians, revolving around political etiquette that scream is simply seen as infantile and unserious. Trump entered politics as that kind of infantile and unserious candidate in the first place, being a cartoonish, stereotypical, Saul Goodman-esque figure. In the end, it's all about expectations that people set. Nobody believed agent orange would win, but in the end he did because he represented a kind of tonal shift in american politics, not to mention straight up saying what all these bourgeois politicians already believed anyway. In the same way LGBTQIA+ want to practice their sexuality without the fear of being killed, beaten or prosecuted, that is the same way in the opposite direction in which fascists want to freely express their racist, sexist, homophobic views without any consequences. Trump said these things out loud, and republicans found him 'cool' because he didn't beat around the bush, at least in the public, about their true beliefs.
Ultimately, Trump isn't some anomaly. He's just a natural unmasking of the fascist paradigm of amerikkka.
i'm excited for the next trump. should be even more unhinged and absurd and evil.
It's looking like we already have him in vivek
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He requested YMCA to dance to… interesting choice.
He requested Ave Maria three times in a row at increasing volumes.
Also he likes ymca because the song calls him a young man.
YMCA is his walk off music at every rally!!! the absolute queen. hahaha.
And they are dancing, the board floor slamming under the jackboots and the fiddlers grinning hideously over their canted pieces. Towering over them all is Donald Trump and he is naked dancing, his small feet lively and quick and now in doubletime and bowing to the ladies, huge and pale and hairless, like an enormous infant. He never sleeps, he says. He says he’ll never die. He bows to the fiddlers and sashays backwards and throws back his head and laughs deep in his throat and he is a great favorite, Donald Trump. He wafts his hat and the lunar dome of his skull passes palely under the lamps and he swings about and takes possession of one of the fiddles and he pirouettes and makes a pass, two passes, dancing and fiddling at once. His feet are light and nimble. He never sleeps. He says that he will never die. He dances in light and in shadow and he is a great favorite. He never sleeps, Donald Trump. He is dancing, dancing. He says that he will never die.
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So... put on Pavarotti singing Ave Maria. Turn it up louder. We want a little action in here. Turn it up louder!
That's for your boy. That's for your boy. Stand up. That's for ya boy.
This is some of the funniest shit I have ever seen. Like this is going to infect my thoughts possibly for the rest of my life
It's always wild when something happenens that goes above the usual level of trumpian bullshit.
Yea they're eating the cats and the dems can control hurricanes to strike republican enclaves but then also the people who show up to help you clean up are also globalist actors.
Yea whatever yawn....
But saying "enough questions, nobody wants to listen to questions let's just play some music instead" and slowly swaying for 40 minutes during a NATIONALLY TELEVISED TOWN HALL while demanding different version of the same song be played three times in a row at increasing volumes.
It's a beautiful level of absurdity that not even the best satirists could come close to.
Andy Kaufman eat your fucking heart out.
Then you have the prestige of the whole spectacle. The dems, the serious hard nosed adults in the room who have spent a lifetime learning to navigate the halls of power ARE IN A DEAD FUCKING HEAT WITH HIM.
The dems, the serious hard nosed adults in the room who have spent a lifetime learning to navigate the halls of power ARE IN A DEAD FUCKING HEAT WITH HIM.
The Dems are very skilled at pleasing themselves and each other and have spent lifetimes building up gatekeeping rituals and mastering those rituals. They have contempt for commoners (and so does 
) but their enemy's vulgarity feels more relatable to many people than the wine-sipping pretension.
Trump also has this going for him: He's willing to admit shit's fucked. He's wrong about what's fucked and why it's fucked, but he's fine saying shit's fucked. He got in on a platform of "America Is Shit Now, We Used To Be Something, Make It Great Again" which is stupid for a myriad of reasons, but the base level of "things here suck" is nice to hear from a candidate. Compare it to Hillary going "we're already great, everything is fine, now It's My Turn at the wheel of empire, vote for your girlboss" then it's clear why he resonated so well.
Now we've got means tester Kamala who is willing to hemm and haw a bit, but it's still in a buttoned up PR-speech way.
America is already great! Happy Birthday to this future president! 
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