this post was submitted on 27 Sep 2024
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Love to see a bunch of shit I'm not qualified for and then a bunch of things that don't begin to cover my expenses and feel bad about myself and my circumstances and cry and eventually put one application for a custodian position with the county because what the fuck else will I do

I know if I went back to school and finished a degree it would give me a leg up but I just can't fucking handle the workload of work and school anymore, I feel like such a lazy piece of shit but I just don't have it in me anymore to keep this shit up

Dealing with a lot of dark thoughts today. Very dark.

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[–] [email protected] 58 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I swear the process is designed to discipline labor. It's a weird hazing ritual we've normalized as part of making a living so you feel indebted to whoever hires you for ending the madness.

[–] [email protected] 39 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It kind of feels like the internet ruined it a bit. Jobs are so fucking competitive now, and posted so far and wide, that everyone is desperately jumping through hoops submitting white-hot applications. I can't just walk in an ask around, and get lucky. Why would they take a risk on me when they can send the job posting out to the most overqualified candidates in the area?

[–] [email protected] 39 points 1 month ago

Corpo ghouls call this "churn" and it's intentional. They want everyone to be in precarious positions so they can be exploited for less.

[–] [email protected] 41 points 1 month ago

From what it looks like out there, "job hunting" often feels more like "job begging" complete with the acts of humiliation, the requirement to roam around and count on the vanishingly scarce generosity of others.

As a formerly homeless person myself, I think I know those dark thoughts because I've had my own. Sometimes, only spite kept me going.

I have no meaningful advice that you probably haven't already heard, except that I believe that every day you're alive is one day closer to outlasting this.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Theres something very dark and twisted in telling people how high youll jump for them in order to survive. I remember being unemployed last year and doing the dumbest most degrading shit for job interviews.

One literally had me do a math test, which I did poorly at, before being asked to do it again. Then they asked me what I wanted to do for a career, which I told them some generic answer until they kept asking and got a real answer, which I told them ideally Id be a professional musician. Which they didnt like. Go figure.

Like normalize just trying to survive. Come on.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

I interviewed for a job years ago that would have involved setting / stocking shelves for a grocery chain, distinctly remember the guy visibly losing interest when I said I hadn't researched the companies mission and core values. Like oh wow I really want to slurp up whatever bullshit the marketing team decided to put up on their website, suck off me.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

distinctly remember the guy visibly losing interest when I said I hadn't researched the companies mission and core values.

oh my god, what kind of dork even cares about that shit?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

Internally, no one. Externally, also no one. It is entirely in the boundary of preliminary hires and preliminary large scale clients, and nothing else

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

When I was in high school, I was turned down for a shelf-stocking position because I didn't have any prior work experience. Of course I didn't? I was a child?

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Holy shit I hate job hunting so fucking much. It feels like it is designed to make neurodivergent people suffer. My last interview was a group interview and fuck I should have just left. Never agreeing to another one of those torture sessions again.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

To be fair it's made to make everyone suffer. Not saying it's not worse for NDs but it's bullshit anyway

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago

You deserve the world meow-hug

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago

I'm scrolling hexbear to distract myself from those exact feelingsdeeper-sadness

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago

You deserve to live a full and flourishing life, Comrade.

I'm sorry Capitalism failed you. This isn't your fault.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

If you have the chance to do a degree you might as well. It's really not that difficult to at least pass. Like, the standard of work I saw from my worst classmates (who all passed) was sometimes quite astounding. I played video games and smoked too much weed, handed stuff in that I thought was totally shoddy, and still got a first. So do a lot of people.

If you do one, make sure it's one with a lot of practical stuff or placements. That way your grade isn't on doing some academic bullshit essay where you have to self motivate in the comfort of your own home where you'd rather be doing anything else, it's about showing up to a place where you can really feel you're learning a real world skill. And you can then put it on your CV. Very valuable. Plus it's fun, you'll meet people you can hang out with. University is more about gaining people skills and confidence than learning, to be honest.

That said... I'm on the job hunt now and I'm not qualified for fucking anything either, lol. That's on me for doing an arts based degree. Every application takes fucking forever too. But with the experience I got from doing a degree, it feels like I'm at least hitting the dartboard, whereas before i was blindly throwing it at the backboard. Once I've thrown 150 darts, I might just get a bullseye one of these days.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago

What I'm close to is an English AA agony-shivering

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I had a couple stints where I sent literally hundreds of applications trying to get an entry level job with the state that I believe generally entail opening mail and never got a single response. I was told that you needed to call and ask about the applications so I made hundreds of calls and the people who answered generally sounded annoyed and would ask if I knew how many people were on a priority list. My bills are fortunately very manageable at the moment and I've been trying to make self employment work but I'm not sure I really have it in me with some undiagnosed auDHD going on. @[email protected] made a post https://hexbear.net/post/3145128 a couple months ago about working at homeless shelters that I've been mulling over, but I've been dragging my feet in DMing her about it.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago

capitalism is specifically designed to make you feel useless when doing anything that is not producing profits for your boss. it's all nonsense dude, nothing that has anything to do with getting a job has anything to do with who you are as a person.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

Job-hunting depression is complemented by the false ego boosting that occurs while you’re employed or studying.

When you’re “in”, you are encouraged to overestimate your own contribution to the economy/world. No one keeps each other in check. Then when you’re unemployed, you are forced to confront the reality of your position as a replaceable laborer. Mere personnel. It’s like this at every level, people lying to themselves and each other about their importance, and denigrating the unemployed in order to solidify their own tenuous position.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

Yeah, you have my empathy, job hunting is brutally alienating, and as with so many things under Capitalism the cruelty is the point. Hope you manage to find something that doesn't totally suck!

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

The slave is sold once and for all; the proletarian must sell himself daily and hourly.

The individual slave, property of one master, is assured an existence, however miserable it may be, because of the master’s interest. The individual proletarian, property as it were of the entire bourgeois class which buys his labor only when someone has need of it, has no secure existence. This existence is assured only to the class as a whole.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

a bunch of shit I'm not qualified for

often these postings are made by HR people who don't actually know shit about the position. my job ad asked for experience in a language that hasn't actually been used in this company for fucking years, i knew that language and then straight up lied about knowing the one we actually use. i apologise if i'm stating the obvious here comrade, but some people in my life don't do this -- 100% apply to shit you're not qualified for and lie about anything that no one can prove. fuck those corpos, good luck meow-hug inshallah

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Going on 13 months since I lost my last job. Right there with you comrade. Solidarity rat-salute-2

My last job rejection (after a series of interviews), they were hiring 10 people for the role. Despite having held the same job title as I was applying for for about 10 years, somehow I was apparently not desirable enough to be one of ten, let alone #1. Fuck 'em all.

Normally I'm lucky to get an interview at all kitty-birthday-sad

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Sorry dude. That sounds...grinding. Hope you find something half way decent soon. You deserve to be treated like a person , with value, and your skills should be recognized too. Solidarity, Internet stranger. I feel for ya.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Someday you'll find the shark fucking position you were made for

Full disclosure I'm employed I just hate my job because it's soul-draining and there's no structure and the work just piles higher and higher and it's a constant sensory overload assault on my eyes and ears

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Thanks comrade. I know it would be emotionally draining work, but I'm hoping to get hired at a local homelessness outreach organization in the coming months. That's my preferred place now, but its been so long that I gotta take what comes first.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

It's depressing as fuck, it's the most degrading process in modern life together with looking for a flat to rent. They're both novel artificial scarcities designed by the system to keep us impoverished and exploited, trying to make us feel worthless so that we'll accept worse conditions.

Another depressing thing was a study some years ago showing that about 50% of positions offered are actually fake, the main reasons being that if you open fake vacants you can pretend your company's growing, and that you can keep your understaffed team more content if you pretend to be looking for more staff.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

stay strong Care-Comrade

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Me but with dating sites.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

I'm worried I'll have start this again soon. My boss and workplace seem very accommodating for bereavement but I've just handed off all my clients and I've been ghosted by workplaces before. Also, casual so "bereavement leave" is just me not getting any hours

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

What are expenses? Do you need a certain number of hours a week to make them, or a certain wage on top of that?