this post was submitted on 07 May 2024
104 points (100.0% liked)

the_dunk_tank

15918 readers
3 users here now

It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

Rule 1: All posts must include links to the subject matter, and no identifying information should be redacted.

Rule 2: If your source is a reactionary website, please use archive.is instead of linking directly.

Rule 3: No sectarianism.

Rule 4: TERF/SWERFs Not Welcome

Rule 5: No ableism of any kind (that includes stuff like libt*rd)

Rule 6: Do not post fellow hexbears.

Rule 7: Do not individually target other instances' admins or moderators.

Rule 8: The subject of a post cannot be low hanging fruit, that is comments/posts made by a private person that have low amount of upvotes/likes/views. Comments/Posts made on other instances that are accessible from hexbear are an exception to this. Posts that do not meet this requirement can be posted to [email protected]

Rule 9: if you post ironic rage bait im going to make a personal visit to your house to make sure you never make this mistake again

founded 4 years ago
MODERATORS
all 35 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 70 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (5 children)

Loving that he did a test with a stick, the truck crushed it and he went ahead and put his finger in it anyway. Real brain of the year guy here.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 6 months ago

most intelligent techbro

[–] [email protected] 19 points 6 months ago

Basically every blue lives matter supporters.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 6 months ago

I think he should test it a few more times with different fingers to make sure it wasn't just a fluke.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago

I feel like at this point it's unfair even to the cybertruck to say that the cybertruck broke his finger, he broke his own finger with the cybertruck.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago

"I'm built different" 😤

[–] [email protected] 56 points 6 months ago (3 children)

I remember seeing some videos discussing how the cybertruck doesn't do anything to prevent closing hoods etc from possibly injuring a person. The comments were full of people going "who would ever do that on purpose" with the replies all along the lines of "nobody, but you don't want to lose a finger because you weren't paying attention".

And I guess now dudes are intentionally sticking their fingers in the trucks to get maimed on purpose

[–] [email protected] 19 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Like those old time scientists that would experiment on themselves 🫡

[–] [email protected] 18 points 6 months ago (1 children)

"If I put my junk in this meat grinder, I wonder what would happen?"

Benjamin Franklin

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago

Directions unclear. Now my junk turned into Benjamin Franklin. (he's wearing bifocals)

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago (1 children)

It's just like crypto. Only morons would spend that much money on a terrible vehicle, and now they are doing absolutely smooth brained shit with their cars. It would honestly be so easy to grift these idiots.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I go as far to say that someone already successfully grifted them.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago

Sure, but it's just loke a hexagon PFP on Twitter. You're now broadcasting to the world that you are eager to fall for another grift

[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 months ago (1 children)

It's for views, clearly it worked

[–] [email protected] 19 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I'm fine with and fully encourage chuds to willingly cause themselves bodily harm to own the libs and virtue signaling how dumb they are.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 6 months ago

It's our duty to comment "🤣🤣🤣 do your hog next 🤣🤣🤣 SUBSCRIBED!!"

[–] [email protected] 45 points 6 months ago

I hadn't thought of this way but it makes a lot of sense.

Fools breaking their fingers in Cybertruck trunks are the equivalent of Pentacostals who handle poisonous snakes and get bitten. They both have faith God would surely not allow anything bad to happen to the devoted.

https://bsky.app/profile/anagramdoe.bsky.social/post/3kruugcaw7j2i

[–] [email protected] 37 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 42 points 6 months ago

"still love the truck though!"

[–] [email protected] 30 points 6 months ago (1 children)

What the fuck, how can a human be this fucking stupid? I've done some dumb shit in my life, but I can tell you that even if I blundered my way up to the beginning of this video there's no fucking way I'd have reached the end of it. Any person who could even possibly be redeemed would look at what happened to the stick, been like "oh fuck, i was clearly wrong" and then just ended the video and never uploaded it

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago

Because they’ll make a few hundred dollars from views and that will cover part of their uninsured Murican ER visit

[–] [email protected] 30 points 6 months ago (1 children)

At this stage I am wondering how many of them would buy a dick blender 3000 just to see how good it blended their dick.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

If it was Tesla CyberDickBlender and it was only sold for crypto then probably more than we think.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

After seeing the laceration on the one guy's knee (skin accidentally touched metal when parking on an incline), I was certain their shit was getting cut off

[–] [email protected] 23 points 6 months ago

Since so few Cybertrucks have been sold, this means one in every few hundred owners have intentionally injured themselves to prove their faith and fealty.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 months ago

These fucking dumbasses are an endless source of entertainment. I just wish their incessant love of cryptocurrency wasn’t contributing to the planet melting.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 6 months ago

Well if I put my finger in a normal car door and slam it I'll also get hurt so this actually isn't a problem nerd

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago

Crushing my finger to own the libs

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Hang on, is the button to close the trunk really burried deep in there like that? I guess I've never owned a car with a trunk that automatically opens and closes, but that seems like a disaster waiting to happen

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago

My mums had a few on Audis. It’s right where you’d want it on the bottom of the boot lid on them.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago

"Just to make sure it's safe, let's try it with this stick!"

stick breaks

"Haha, cool! Hopefully something has inexplicably changed in the 3 seconds between what just happened and now, when I'm about to do this to my bones! Here we go!"

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago (1 children)

A step up from running their kids over

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago

Dear Elon,

The cybertruck update for safety is still flawed, maybe. I know the engineers over there are working hard on it. I've been able to drive my cybertruck for many days in the past few weeks whenever it has not been in the shop.

Anyways, keep up the good work. Great vehicle I wish I could buy another.

Love,