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Not sure, if you're actually looking for an explanation or rather just want to rant and/or hope for dating tips, but maybe still helpful to be aware of:
With your specific expectations, you're somewhere to the far left or far right, whichever way you want to read it.
For example, this graph could be applied to alcohol consumption, with 0 on the left and lots on the right. Then you're on the far left.
The Y-axis shows how many people exist in that range. There's some median alcohol consumption, which is going to be in the center of this diagram, where most people are. At 0 alcohol consumption, there's very few people, because it's an extreme.
Obviously, this simplifies a lot. In a real survey, there's probably actually somewhat of a bump at 0 alcohol, because certain religions prohibit consumption.
But yeah, in general, you're hoping for relatively many extremes, so the number of people that match that are quite low. You will naturally get magnitudes more romantic interest from Average Joes, because there's just magnitudes more of them.
As somebody else already said, try to find groups that naturally attract folks from the extremes that you look for, like outdoor sports groups.
Online dating, as problematic as it is, can also be rather good at finding very specific extremes.
This is the most likely explanation by far. You are looking for such a small subset of the available population, you are unlikely to hit on what you want by chance.
You would need to either increase your tolerance in some direction (need fit & active, don't mind some drinking, some junk food as long as they don't care you don't join in that).
One other thought, I am a lady but if I met a guy who was TOO clean living, I'd worry how he was in bed, does he consider sex a vice too? Some of those guys are kinda crazy.
Maybe ask your friends if they know anyone you might vibe with or try online dating apps.
A stats lesson in response to a dating question?! Awesome
Thank you for taking the time to write that
Everything is statistics.
Especially lies and damn lies ๐
(Not the case this time though, nice breakdown by trem)
86.9% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
27.3% of people know that
Haha, I came here to say the same thing. Basically the average person (at least in the US) will probably be overweight (4 in 10 adult men are obese in the US - https://www.cdc.gov/obesity/data-and-statistics/adult-obesity-prevalence-maps.html)
Add in any other negative factor (smoking, drinking, misogynistic) and you're probably covering 60-70% of the men in the US!
I've made myself sad with data :(