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Trans Megathread for the Week of 2025-01-06 to 2025-01-12 - Children of Time by Adrian Tchaikovsky (hexbear.net)

submitted 4 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

386 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Children of Time is a 2015 science fiction novel by Adrian Tchaikovsky.

In the distant future, humanity seeks to create new habitats for itself on distant planets, terraforming them and seeding them with life. Dr. Avrana Kern is heading one such project, orbiting the tentatively named "Kern's World", where the plan is to release monkeys le-monke infected with a nanovirus that will accelerate their evolution. Through an act of sabotage from an anti-technology group that has also destroyed much of Earth, the monkeys are never released, and the virus instead infects a species of spider, Portia labiata. The book follows the evolution of the spiders and their eventual civilisation, as well as a remnant of humanity that fled to Kern's World hoping to find paradise.

also children of ruin and children of memory, the sequels, are really good

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 2 hours ago) (1 children)

yapping about dysphoria, I don't actually know if this is coherent

Shaving takes so much work. And as much as I guess it's for me, like, it bugs me that I've been prioritizing self-care, self-reflection, self-exploration essentially since COVID and it hasn't had the desired affect of me becoming more of someone that people naturally want to be friends with.

I thought working on myself would demonstrate value or something, like my classmates at the time would see that and want to help. That's what I did for them, I would help if I thought someone needed it. Maybe I'm overthinking the concept of attracting or manifesting, or whatever. Like, I don't know if I understand what makes people want to stay in touch, I don't think that's an emotion that has been directed towards me. I don't know if I register socially, like I'm not viewed as someone who can be invited out for pizza, or texted,, or whatever.

But I can put zero effort in, go a week without shaving, wear sweats. Or I can moisturize, style my hair, and pick out all kinds of jewelry. I feel as though I'm overlooked, regardless of how I try to present. I just keep wondering at what point I can have, point blank, the conversations I want to have.

I often wish I were a woman, but I also don't think I know a goddamn thing about women, but ALSO know it's not great to be like "women are a separate category that confuses me" internally. So I somehow feel invalid no matter how I approach this.

I think I'll feel this way until a member of the local LGBTQ+ community catches me in a big cartoonish net because I see no way to solve everything about myself on my own. I think I'm at the natural endpoint of being a man, lmao

I feel like I'm caught in some sort of Ouroboros where my problems just keep feeding each other. I wish I could just like, see what happens in the minds of well adjusted people. I wish I could load a save where I already have someone who is gonna notice if I disappear or am not doing well.

I truly feel like if I were able to explain the exact intricacies of what I'm discovering to be a Russian Nesting Doll of trauma to someone, that person would be compelled to help. I keep saying this, but please talk me down if I'm talking crazy. I want to be told that I'm an idiot if these things are stupid. To let me sit in the wrongness for this long is unfair.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 13 minutes ago

spoiler

It really is a lot of work.

I don't think that's a correct expectation to have. I don't think most people would pay attention to like, your legs being shaved and think they should talk to you more. I think in general that kind of thing doesn't matter too much, I mean being attractive helps but I'm not sure the extent of it. I think what makes people want to stay in touch is them enjoying being around you, whatever that means for that person. Having a deeper connection once that is there is probably also important, how deep/personal people want to be depends a lot on the person and how they perceive you though.

Maybe you could clarify, what things about women don't you get or think are different? I haven't been friends with that many people but the biggest difference I could put a finger on is women seem more willing to talk about personal things. That kinda just tells me not to talk about personal issues with guys, its kinda good news if you want to be/friends with women in my opinion.

I personally am probably not a great person to help with trauma, although I am of course willing to listen, but I think this mega is a good place to explain it if you wanted to. Other people definitely have, and you can hopefully get input from people with experience dealing with it. Vs like talking to one particular person, maybe they aren't able to help. Especially if its gender related, honestly can't imagine trying to get the majority of my support on gender stuff from cis people irl.

I don't think you're an idiot or crazy. I think it'd be good for you to expand on some of what you've said, even if you aren't 100% able to communicate your feelings or if they aren't the "right" way to think about things.