Post text, images, or direct links only (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 years ago by loopy@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

5 comments fedilink

Please see the updated sidebar. Do not post external links to websites such as Facebook and Instagram.

119

Please post jokes about adult topics to the new Uncle Jokes community (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 years ago* (last edited 6 months ago) by loopy@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

9 comments fedilink

Update 2025-9-11: If you cannot tell this joke to a 5-year-old and they would understand, you should probably post it to the this community: !unclejokes@lemmy.world. Please message me if you think it could be different.

My uncle said he use to live in a house haunted by the ghost of a dessert chef (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 hour ago* (last edited 41 minutes ago) by 64bithero@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

3 comments fedilink

He said he really gave him the crepes !

144

Do they allow it? (thelemmy.club)

submitted 7 hours ago by NarrativeBear@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

1 comments fedilink

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/44614689

885

Meow (thelemmy.club)

submitted 1 day ago by 64bithero@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

37 comments fedilink

171

Remember when using Botox was kind of taboo? (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 day ago by Tugboater203@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

15 comments fedilink

Now no one raises an eyebrow!

409

Coming up with good titles is cumbersome. I just can’t dill with it. (thelemmy.club)

submitted 1 day ago by cannedtuna@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

7 comments fedilink

What do you call a snake on car glass in Germany? (lemmy.ca)

submitted 1 day ago by Quilotoa@lemmy.ca to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

11 comments fedilink

A vindshield viper

122

I was out at the bar the other night and the bartender yelled "Does anyone know CPR?" I yelled back "I know the whole alphabet "... (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 days ago by Tugboater203@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

3 comments fedilink

Everybody laughed, except this one guy, of course

131

A ton is heavy (lemmy.world)

submitted 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) by 64bithero@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

3 comments fedilink

But not if you write it backwards!

(Credit to Dgar on Mastodon)

I tell dad jokes quite often (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 3 days ago by Susaga@sh.itjust.works to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

0 comments fedilink

He tends to like them

Did you see the movie about rivers and waterfalls? (lemmy.world)

submitted 3 days ago by Tugboater203@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

6 comments fedilink

It's now streaming!

A duck walks into a drugstore and says, "I'd like some lip gloss" (lemmy.world)

submitted 3 days ago by robocall@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

4 comments fedilink

The clerk says, "certainly sir, will this be cash or card?"

The duck says, "put it on my bill"

173

Wholesome (thelemmy.club)

submitted 4 days ago by FenrirIII@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

4 comments fedilink

cross-posted from: https://feddit.org/post/27320191

Origami: [reddit] [via lemmy]

When I tell my wife that I'm going to do something, I'll do it..... (lemmy.world)

submitted 4 days ago by Tugboater203@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

2 comments fedilink

She doesn't need to keep reminding me every 6 months

What do you call a seagull when it lives in a bay? (lemmy.ca)

submitted 4 days ago by Quilotoa@lemmy.ca to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

5 comments fedilink

Bagel

120

What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? (lemmy.world)

submitted 5 days ago by Tugboater203@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

10 comments fedilink

One is a heavy animal, rhe other is a little lighter...

172

Just when you think “vegetables don’t have phones”… (lemmy.world)

submitted 6 days ago by cannedtuna@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

8 comments fedilink

Onion rings…

What do you call an Irishman who bounces off walls? (lemmy.world)

submitted 6 days ago by Tugboater203@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

5 comments fedilink

Rick O'Shea!

Happy St Patty's Day!

I tried to stop my professor before he told that awful joke about perpetual motion (lemmy.world)

submitted 6 days ago by 64bithero@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

2 comments fedilink

But he kept on going ..

174

In 3,024 years life will either be really good or really bad (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 week ago by jqubed@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

4 comments fedilink

It’s 5050

What's a Grecian urn? (lemmy.ca)

submitted 1 week ago by Quilotoa@lemmy.ca to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

6 comments fedilink

About ten bucks an hour.

129

I've been diagnosed with a fear of giants. It's called.... (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 week ago by Tugboater203@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

2 comments fedilink

Feefiphobia!

What people are kinda sweet? (lemmy.blahaj.zone)

submitted 1 week ago by atheqtpie@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

2 comments fedilink

...the Swedish

You shouldn't starve a cold. (lemmy.ca)

submitted 1 week ago by Quilotoa@lemmy.ca to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

1 comments fedilink

You might make a cold sore.

Dad Jokes

22747 readers

859 users here now

Description

This is a community for sharing those cheesy “dad” jokes that invoke an eye roll or chuckle.

Rules

Clean jokes only please. If you cannot tell this joke to a 5-year-old and they can understand, you probably shouldn’t post it here. Please post edgier jokes to: !unclejokes@lemmy.world
Adult topics with which to be cautious or avoided: drugs, sex, death, racism.
Must post text, image (e.g., meme), or direct link. Do not post external links that cannot be viewed directly from the community (e.g., link to joke website, Facebook, Instagram, etc.)
Follow Lemmy.World Code of Conduct

founded 2 years ago

MODERATORS

loopy@lemmy.world