this post was submitted on 26 Feb 2024
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[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (1 children)

MarioKart so hit and run or throwing things at other cars

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[–] Squirrel 7 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

RimWorld... I'm not the type for cannibalism or human skin hats, but I do produce and sell a shitload of cocaine.

Oh, and I killed a child colonist, in this run. There was a bug in her age-up event, and the game would not let me proceed until she was... removed. I hate killing children, but since it was the end of the world without doing so, I give myself a pass this time

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Killing Nazis

Good thing I don’t have to worry about that ever happening IRL…

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago

Demolishing robots with a magnetic guitar-sword in beat with my rock playlist that plays in my heart.🤘

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (3 children)

Idk...Being a good lawyer? I was just playing The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Assisting a vampire in plotting and then carrying out the murder of her father.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (2 children)

climbing a mountain and curing my depression

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago

Being an ex yakuza

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (3 children)

Genociding an entire planet, making said planet implode.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I'd probably be done in for EPA violations (Satisfactory).

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago

Being too homosexual.

FFXIV

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (3 children)

Mass murdering animals.

Doing 95mp/h in a semi down the shoulder of a highway in Colorado.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (1 children)

For yelling too loud.

Statement of an observing police officer:

They say ToxicWaste murdered that Salesman... with his voice! Shouted him apart!

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Going a-víking and dismembering "a few" Englishmen...

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago

Crushing LEGO villains and collecting silver, gold, and purple studs.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Uh...is travelling through time and mass exterminating purple lovecraftian monsters with my pet bird a crime? Because if not, I got nothin

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Rolling a ball that, through exponential growth, eventually starts to swallow up the likes of skyscrapers, clouds, Godzilla, and the planets of the galaxy.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (2 children)

Running a 75 ton Timberwolf Battlemech.

Pretty sure just turning the thing on would be enough to get me arrested. Civilians typically aren't allowed Surface To Surface missiles, and megawatt power lasers that are effective weapons at a range of over 1000m.

I'll have a 100 ton Madcat 2 soon.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

Driving a Trabant through the desert. Occasionally shooting rabid bunnies.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (3 children)

Playing poker with a non-standard deck.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

mass killing of scribble spiders? idk

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

Legend of Zelda, maybe somebody finally had enough of me smashing all their pots and cutting all their grass. I don't think those monsters are calling the cops for all the murder, they always seem to pop right back anyway.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

Making my government into an expansionist empire and leading its armies with a bit too much detail.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)

literally what is there to say about geometry dash, it's a fucking square

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Graveyard Keeper.

I don't even know. An absurd amount of mishandling and experimenting on corpses.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (2 children)

definately animal abuse.
i put 25 cows into a 1m² pen.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

Spreading Managed Democracy, whether they want it or not!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (4 children)

Last game I've played was egg, inc. It's a mobile idle "numbers go up" game.. There's nothing overtly criminal, so probably tax evasion or something on my trevigintillion bocks.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Polluting and extracting every raw resource for my own benefit, mindlessly destroying the native alien population as they attempt to stop my destruction of their land.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

I wonder if there's a significant factorio/Linux overlap on lemmy?

Though you could be satisfactory...

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I thought satisfactory at first too, but fluffy tailed hogs and lizard doggos don't seem to give a shit that I just built an oil pipeline and two dozen oil refineries in their home.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

Destruction of property and I guess kidnapping by rolling everything in earth into a giant ball

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

Killing mr house

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

For apprehending or killing terrorists, and defusing their bombs in a hospital terror attack

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Trying to commit a hostile takeover by having my company's employees fistfight their company's employees in the town square.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

Murdering zombies with plants.

One could say it's zombies vs. plants!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (3 children)

Playing cards...? It was solitaire 😅

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Driving my rocket powered car into someone so they explode. What a save.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

Forging a committed relationship with Shadowheart.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

I’m not sure I’m getting arrested. Me and a team of mercenaries were fighting another team of mercenaries over suitcases of intelligence. Seems like a state of war.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (3 children)

Killing hundreds of zombies, skeletons, creepers, and Illagers, not so I can save the villagers they wrongly imprisoned, but so I can get that one specific gilded sword.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

Trespassing - have to catch that pokemon for Pokemon Go.

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