this post was submitted on 09 Feb 2024
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  • authenticity -> real and genuine

  • autonomy -> seperate individual (not enmeshed)

  • curiosity -> growth mindset and learning constantly

  • growth -> improving functioning and increased awareness of change and adapting to new circumstances

  • peace -> absence of conflict and abnegation of other people's drama/entitlements

  • pleasure -> enjoying or benefitting from the actions I take and consequences of those I maintain relationships with

  • respect -> genuine care for recognizing and upholding other's needs where it is safe and not incompatible with your own

  • reciprocity -> balanced approach to give/take and being mutually-attentive to signs of imbalance

  • safety -> avoiding things, people, places, situations that hurt you or cause you to be unable to enforce the protections you need to accomodate yourself in the context

  • stabillity -> expectation of consistency and balance and sustainabillity in one's relationship with anything/anyone.

These are sort of a rough outline of mine, how about yours Lemmings? Mine aren't exhaustive but these are the core simplest profile I could break down. Feel free to steal anything and add to your collection ;)

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Love others as much as I love myself.

Action is better than reaction.

Produce more than I consume.

Avoid violence against other people, all types of violence: physical, economic, emotional, social.

Take care of the environment.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago (1 children)

So (correct me if im off base anywhere)

love others

equality/fairness + compassion

action is better than reaction

autonomy (doing this because you need them done and not from external influence or coercion)

produce more than consumer

contribution + reciprocity (kinda conflates with equality and fairness

violence against others

reciprocity and justice

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

The only one you're off on is action / reaction. That's about doing what I ethically decide to do rather than obeying the desires of my body or my brain.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

autonomy (doing this because you need them done and not from external influence or coercion)

Your example is seemingly compatible with the description I gave, autonomy means someone/thing isn't arbitrarily pulling your strings and unduly influencing your outputs, I wasn't pitting your ethics against your needs. I would argue that your ethics are needs in a sense altho I might not be able to necesarily vigorously defend that on a technical level for now

Autonomy is basically are you an agent or principal when it comes to your life and your abillity to control the things that belong to you. For example, your parents are not entitled to any of your body, mind, emotions, etc, they belong to you and they must not be subject to arbitrary control from anybody else, otherwise there's almost certainly gaslighting and you're probably dying inside a little more every time you deny yourself agency

[–] [email protected] 8 points 9 months ago (1 children)
  1. Serve the public trust
  2. Protect the innocent
  3. Uphold the law
[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

Do the least harm while doing the most good.

Ends do not justify means.

That which can be asserted without evidence, can be dismissed without evidence.

Never attribute to malice what can be explained adequately by ignorance.

When confronting and assessing any system of belief one must always ask one self, what are the facts?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

Freedom, respect.

Pretty much all my other core values stem from one of those two (also important to mention that "my freedom ends where yours begins").

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago
  1. Big beats are the best

  2. Get high all the time

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

How do I want to be treated?

Probably most other people want the same.

How do I feel when I'm not treated with kindness or respect?

How do I feel when I'm misunderstood or wrongly accused?

Probably most other people feel the same.

I know I'm not perfect at this. But at the end of the day, when I'm reflecting on my day's interactions, I'm thinking of how I could have done things better. And hopefully over time I'll be the kind of person I'd like to encounter and maybe even be friends with. That's all we can hope for, to leave tiny breadcrumbs of positivity and to be remembered fondly.

There's a lot of divisiveness and hostility and cognitive biases in the world today. I don't think it needs to be this way but I also think it's largely outside our ease to control. Holding onto and constantly reflecting upon our core values, values I believe most other people share, may help regain our control and our humanity.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

Integrity, autonomy, and the scientific method

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

Don't be an asshole.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

My core values are:

Learn everything you can

Share the knowledge you have gained

Don't be a dick

Help out

Don't be afraid to roll up your sleeves

Work until the job is done

And don't fucking take yourself seriously.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

I am whatever the day wants me to be.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago
  • Horny -> I need to cum

  • Happy -> I just came

  • Healthy -> I have cummed

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago (1 children)

People are worth investing in. Money isn't power. You get only that which you fight for.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago (1 children)

People are worth investing in. Money isn’t power.

I don't think you meant it this way but what I've been considering recently is our culture's obsession with consumption over offering. We generally admire those who've obtained and retain tangible wealth more than those who have obtained and share wisdom, aid, and generosity. We, society in general, look up to and want to be more like those with big houses and flashy cars and "have things" while we tend to not aspire to be someone who gives and sacrifices and genuinely tries to make the world a better place. Because capitalism and corporations and the media and the government have nothing to gain from a culture of people who want to give more than consume.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

Insightful af

[–] Birdie 2 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

What would you say the difference is between authenticity and integrity?

Or do they more or less both boil down to honesty 🤔

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

In a general sense (edit lack of) integrity involves compromising/adjusting your values for convenience, expedience, or personal gain.

A very common shape this takes is people who have a standard of behavior for others in the world, but they somehow cannot apply that standard to themselves.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

Mistakes are ok, and if you can't accept that, then fuck yourself.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

Mine are: treat others as you want to be treated, and have respect for other people's opinions. But those seem to go right out the window when I'm on this forum.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I've never really thought about it. I may be a philosophical zombie.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Neither did I till I had the time till recently. I believe they are important to understanding problematic relationships and dynamics and yourself by extension

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

venerate the mindful discernment with grace

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

You guys have values?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

Humans are inherently good. Machines/tools are useful.

The rest falls into place.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I don't know you, therefore I don't trust you until I do

Respect has to be earned

Leave me alone

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

I vehemently disagree with your 2nd point. Respect is mutual and I will respect anyone until that respect is lost. Though it can be earned back over time.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

What would you pick as your top 3? Top 2?

I see autonomy sorta winding through this one, any thoughts on why that's a big deal for you?

Curious as I've done this exercise before but only in short lists. I think I did it in couples therapy once as well, and, yeah, autonomy probably not a good one in the setting.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Autonomy - The same core reason that sexism, racism, transphobia, classism and ableism is wrong, is also the reason I am vegan. A creatures birth does not dictate what it is "meant" for. So long as your desires so not cause suffering in another you are free to determine your own life's purpose, and when you do intentionally cause legitimate suffering in another, you are ethically required to stop.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 9 months ago (1 children)

creatures birth does not dictate what it is "meant" for

Tell that to hungry predetors.

Also, Ethics = subjective..so have fun with that

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

A bear or tiger has no concept of morality or ethics so they have no obligation to abide by it. Humans do, which is why it would be wrong to hurt that animal for your own meat/skin/trophy pleasure.

Take a step back and realize how silly it is to object to human morality because tigers don't.