this post was submitted on 04 Jan 2024
530 points (96.2% liked)

Funny

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[–] [email protected] 100 points 8 months ago (3 children)

I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom I can tell you I don't have money, but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my food go now that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you, but if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you and I will kill you.

[–] [email protected] 47 points 8 months ago

Delivery Driver: Please understand... it was all business. It wasn't personal.

OP / Liam Neesan: It was all personal to me.

[–] [email protected] 45 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 8 months ago

Good luck...

[–] [email protected] 53 points 8 months ago (1 children)

"Fair enough. I'll defer reporting you for lack of delivery. Hope your day gets better!"

[–] [email protected] 65 points 8 months ago (2 children)

If I'm ordering delivery I'm probably not in the greatest place either, but I'm not heartless.

"I'm sorry to hear you're having a bad day. Bring me my food unscathed, and I'll place a second order you can pick up and keep. What do you want to drink?"

[–] [email protected] 15 points 8 months ago

I read the note in dramatic Shakespearean voice 8/10 not bad at all

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Wouldn't some other driver be able to pick that one? I don't think it would work too well...

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Don't do it through the delivery, set it for pickup and give them the details.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

Oh yeah... Good point.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

I would guess this person has reached their breaking point many many times.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 8 months ago (5 children)

So... what do you say to that?

[–] [email protected] 117 points 8 months ago (3 children)

Screenshot and send to door dash personally. Sorry you're having a bad day but maybe I am too? Maybe I'm having a worse day and couldn't bring myself to cook. Dasher wants to get food at the place I ordered from? Awesome. Go for it. This is stealing though and idc how bad of a day you're having. You shouldn't be delivering food if you can't... Deliver the food

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

I wonder if there was a tip too

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

Motherfucker is going to have the worse day after he eats my food.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I mean, me personally? "I fuckin feel that, no worries"

Most people? "That sucks" and contact doordash support for a redund prolly

[–] [email protected] 42 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Remember you're hungry when you get this message. IDK about you but rhat turns me into a different beast altogether.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 8 months ago

Don't get me wrong, I'd be pissed. However, I've been in a similar state, and making them feel worse than they already are really isn't something I want to do. I'm certainly not some saint that instantly forgives and forgets, but this person clearly has some serious problems and I don't want to make it worse for them

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Hangry is no joke. First thing my wife asks me if I have an attitude is if I'm hungry. 9/10 I am.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago

Hanger is a lack of self control.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

I would probably say something like:

"I feel you, homie. I'm making another order—what do you want?"

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago
[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I work for Liam Neeson, you just ate his lunch.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 8 months ago

His doctor just told him he's riddled with aids.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 8 months ago

"Dam, sorry to hear that, hope you get better." reported

[–] [email protected] 12 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I especially love how real this is!!!

[–] [email protected] -1 points 8 months ago

👁️👄👁️

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago (1 children)

We got a connoisseur over here!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Real ezikiel 23:20 hours