Going out of your way to be an asshole instead of just getting in with your life is definitely healthy and sane.

Just don’t participate. Please tell me this is a bit and I’m just an idiot.

Severing ties typically means stop calling them. Stop participating. This is none of that.

You're doing it wrong and making yourself look like an asshole. Instead bring up hot button issues like you're completely unaware and then play god's perfect centrist so your extended family members look like rabid lunatics instead of you

bad bait

Communism is when you yell that you're a communist and then shit your pants as loud as possible

Socialism is when I'm a smug, resentful little asshole who nobody likes and who actively pushes people against socialism.

Just chill out, eat some potatoes, and radicalize the kid's table.

An actual good thing to do would be to just aggressively counter bigotry from your family members. Call out their racist and homophobic comments, call out their toxic liberalism. Don't just let that shit ride, do something about it.

Being an asshole and torching shit for no reason achieves nothing but actively undermining everything else you say and do.

Just don't go

My personal opinion is that making everyone as uncomfortable as possible should start with you shitting your pants today and just walking around with it fermenting until Thanksgiving rolls around. I know I'd be uncomfortable if you walked into my thanksgiving like that.

I’m sorry, but this shit is hella funny. The idea of someone purposefully dropping the turkey on the floor while yelling at their family members about how awful they all are. Like come on that’s hilarious.

You want more ideas and too many people moralizing. I’ll give you some ideas

• I’m sure there’s situations or family events that people avoid like the plague. Bring them up repeatedly. Preferably the same one to different groups of people. Really get em talking about it.
• Do that thing where you say five people’s names before you get the right one, but do it everytime you talk to someone.
• Laugh during the prayer before dinner. Say Inshallah loudly instead of Amen.
• Bring a food that stinks up the whole house.
• Find a way to play cricket on the TV and then hide the remote.
• Ask people if they can “keep it down.” Then whisper when you talk.
• One of the most important things you can do is get the younger people in your family on your side. So do things to make them laugh that rile up the older ones.
• when they spew their awful takes don’t debate just constantly go psshhhhh. Ed Bassmaster style.
• If you do end up dropping the Turkey. Don’t throw it on the ground. Really make a scene out of it. Trip over the turkey after you drop it. You want them feeling bad for you. Also bring tofu and say “Well at least we can all still have Tofurkey.”
• You’ve learned one thing with these people. Arguing and shaming doesn’t work in a society that otherwise rewards their shitty behavior. So just derail conversations and have fun. No point in making yourself all riled up for real. If you want to do it for show, fine, but if you’re going to go have fun with it.

Thanks, dronebama

have you considered simply not going?

Thing is, I have WASPy relatives that I'm unfortunately going to be spending thanksgiving with as well and they're capital C CHUDs. I'm warning you, getting all up in their face is what they want. You could call them cracker all you want but CHUDs are mostly immune to emotional damage. If you go about it like that, all they'll do is laugh about it at work about how they totally owned their SJW relatives.

There's a more nuanced strategy I take. Just make them feel like the burden. You're there to have fun and they're the ones that cannot put politics aside for a single goddamn day if you have to call something out make sure to end it with "look, I'm not trying to argue, I'm just saying."

Act like you've been indoctrinated by the "terrorist group Hummus"

I'm having a get-together with in-laws and loved ones that has nothing directly to do with the Burgerland tradition, and I'm putting it on roughly at the same time as the chuds in my biological family so they can feel the absences that much more glaringly.

That's it. That's all I'm doing, and if it's anything like previous years half of what the chuds will talk about at their partially vacant table is how mad they are that the wokes are too brainwashed to sit there and listen to the regularly scheduled why-they-are-better-than-everyone-else-and-what-is-wrong-with-everyone-else Calvinistic sermonizing.

invite your comrades and do some cultural revolution shit

Pretend it's a yemeni wedding

Just start calling them liberals.

Bring a boombox and play the Palestinian communist song at full volume on a 10 hour loop. Write "Death to the first world unlimited genocide" on a shirt

If you hate it so much, why go?

I think some silly prank is vastly inferior to just doing a "Stalin shouldn't have stopped at Berlin" style argument

I’m at the point of not going and all my relatives are libs. I mean there isn’t a single chud at these gatherings and I still can’t stand it.

You should actually try to get arrested. Be taken into custody during dinner.