Not wanting to be a stay-at-home dad feels like such a boomer mentality. Like, seriously, what father is so disengaged from their kids that they wouldn't want to spend more time with them, given the option? Being a stay-at-home parent is a lot of work, no one's contesting that, but there's no contesting that it's more satisfying work than working for some megacorp's bottom line.
what father is so disengaged from their kids that they wouldn't want to spend more time with them, given the option?
Boomers, you said it yourself. Being a stay at home dad was unheard of and seen as emasculating. So silly.
Yeah, it has the same energy as the endless jokes about men hating their wives.
Man COVID was the chance for me to do that and it was amazing. Being stuck with my wife and kid 24/7 was a blessing. A monkeys paw blessing for sure but I still enjoyed it.
I haven’t never understood those jokes. There’s billions of women in this world, you have picked up one for yourself. Why would you pick up one you hated for? It doesn’t make any sense.
Or babysitting. "Stuck babysitting again, haha?". Nope, just walking around with my child like any other parent.
My boomer dad was a sort of stay at home dad in the off season for his construction work. (Temperature dependent waterproofing).
We got to spend winters wood working, skiing (he was an instructor and coach to allow us to afford it) and just being around to have fun with.
He died too young to meet my son, but I’ve been basically working from home in a similar way as much as possible and just got home from the mountain where I work to get us free passes and lessons.
Painting all boomers as misogynists is understandable, as many were, probably after being brought up by the war babies and silent ge. But many weren’t like that, had hippie roots and never succumbed to the yuppie greed that many did in the 80s.
The housing crisis unlocked that in me, and I’ve never worked steady jobs since then. I was lucky enough to be part of what’s now called a lifestyle startup (prioritizing comfortable life work, instead of grinding growth), but we made it 10 years before our market vanished with COVID. But I wouldn’t change much, except getting better dental coverage and moving to a country with universal healthcare.
To be fair, some people aren't great at being a homemaker--it's a particular passion and skill set and it's not for everyone. But blindly drawing that distinction on gender lines is definitely a boomer thing.
Had an older guy at work who had four kids, and when it came up in conversation, he proudly noted that he had never changed a diaper. Told him that I'd be mortified to admit I was such a useless dad.
I wasn't great at it, until I learned how to do it. It's not hard. YouTube helps.
There are some aspects that aren't skill-based though. Anyone can do it, but some people thrive in that environment, while others have a more difficult time, just like any other job.
I'm sitting here cuddling with my infant son and I never want to go back to work. I'll have to (so will my wife), and I hate that for both of us. But I definitely don't want to.
You’d think so, but they’ve done studies and there tends to be more marital issues in families where the woman makes more of, or all of, the money.
Personally I agree that it shouldn’t be defined along gender lines. We don’t have kids, but my husband is way better with babies and children than I am. It would make much more sense (if we could afford it) for me to work and him to stay home. But it seems that, society-wise, we have a long way to go.
Counterpoint: I took some months off work when my first one was born. And I hated it. I felt that all my value was as “baby-sustaining-machine”, the highest mental skill requested any given day was loading a laundry load and it was very socially isolating (not many people available during working hours for socializing). At the same time, it was stressful being constantly the only one in charge. I was relieved to drop them at daycare and get back to work.
Now that they are of early school age, I enjoy spending time with them, but I also find it taxing. I know I wouldn’t be a good parent if I were to do it 24/7. But I am glad to spend every non-school moments together.
I am firmly of the opinion that babies suck, but kids - once they reach the age that they can engage with you at some minimal level - are great, and the older they get, the more fun they are.
Ain't no way anyone makin 12 million a year settling for me 🤣
😅🤣
Joke’s on you. I’ll do it for way less and the lingerie is not necessary, I’ll bring my own.
I would
Then hire a cleaner
A chef
A gardener
A housemaid
And just chill with my kids
Word. Spending time with them is the real prize.
Just hire a nanny too and go get milk from the store.
Damned amateur.
why would I get milk from the store when the nanny can just milk me instead?
$12 million a year? In two years time we’re retired and the kids are set for life.
I would do it for a lot less than that.
That is not a 12-million dollar earners' kitchen
Naw that's just rent in LA.
Right I forgot this was 2026
You don't stay rich, by spending it all.
No because of gender roles i will demand she quits this high paying job and stay at home and we both live off my minimum wage. /s
12 million Zimbabwe dollars
Oh man, that's $33k/year :( When dealing with any genie or monkey paw, always specify which currency you want the money to be in!
I'll admit $33k/year is on the low end, but in a country where the average income is $4800 that's still pretty good.
We're both stay-at-home, without kids, but still not making 12m/yr.
Also: what an oddly specific sum...🤔
I am on paternity leave now and I love it. If my wife was making 12 million I would never go back.
That's my dream
Do I have to wear the lace all the time? I don't look good in lace.
And honestly probably not; not because I have any objections to her being the breadwinner or have any weird ideas about who raises kids, but mostly because I'm not sure I could do it. I'd be a pretty shit father.
How do people feel about stay at home spouses without kids? Is that something that is generally frowned upon?
People feel weird about it, but it's perfectly fine.
My wife doesn't work a paying job, we don't have kids, but in almost every conversation when I'm meeting someone when they ask what my wife does and I tell them, they always follow it up with like, "Oh does she work from home?" or "Oh, does she sell stuff online?"
It often breaks their brain that she doesn't work a paid job.
But surely she does something, right? I'd love the opportunity to no longer work & still be comfortable, but at the same time I know I'll get bored. I like working, I just hate that capitalism forces me.
Oh, yes, she does a lot, but for opsec reasons I'm not really providing details.
She just doesn't get paid to do it, call it hobbies mostly.
Ah. She kills people for fun. I understand and support her lifestyle.
I know a few stay at home partners/spouses and all act the same: highly demanding and think they're better than everyone else because their partners are high earners despite never achieving anything in life. That's why it personally gives me the ick. Kudos to anyone who is in that situation, but doesn't act entitled.
Luckily she's hardly that way. She's actually got really bad guilt about it and has wanted to abandon things just to work a paying job so she can tell people that's what she does.
Great job if you can get it!
I’m on board
Bro, I'd do that if my partner made one twentieth of this kinda money.
I mean look, it's fine in the short-term, but when do you get to enjoy your money?
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