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[–] 117 points 11 months ago (15 children)

Friendly reminder that the reason we get funny headlines like this from Florida is that the state allows the media full access to their police records so they can find stories like this

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  • [–] 42 points 11 months ago (3 children)

    But also because Florida is full of these.

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  • [+] 10 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (8 children)
  • [–] 44 points 11 months ago (5 children)

    “Innocent until proven guilty” but also your photo is published for posterity so when someone puts your name into their favourite search engine it’s the first thing to pop up, next to a crime you didn’t commit.

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  • [–] 4 points 11 months ago* (3 children)

    The alternative is you try to find Jimmy but he's fucking gone. The state took him away and there is no record. He's just gone, arrested, sent who knows where.

    Though the point is moot because now the federal government is doing that everyday to whoever they want.

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  • [–] 22 points 11 months ago

    In theory, however it also publicises stories of wrongfully accused people for example. This can have some unwanted and serious repercussions.

    All in all I tend to believe that it's better to let the judicial system work in peace and without an excess of publicity.

    I'm not usian though, so I'm not considering the monetary angle.

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  • [+] 42 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (15 children)
  • [–] 13 points 11 months ago (4 children)

    Defendant: Nuh, uh. Everyone knows it’s called “DWI”—driving while intoxicated—which doesn’t really help me either, does it?

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  • [–] 8 points 11 months ago (3 children)

    "Your honor, I was not being influenced by the drink I had. It did not say or act in any way such that my behavior would change. Secondly, I was not driving while intoxicated. Intoxicated as defined by the dictionary literally says 'stupefied by alcohol.' that cannot have happened because at no point was I stupid."

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    [–] 20 points 11 months ago (1 child)

    Lawyer: Dude, this defense is so rock solid.

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  • [–] 17 points 11 months ago (9 children)

    In Germany, you are allowed to drink while driving if you stay below the limit.

    You will 100% get pulled over for a funny test, though.

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  • [+] 10 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (3 children)
  • [–] 8 points 11 months ago (4 children)

    Interesting. In the US, most jurisdictions have open container laws: A drink needs to be either factory sealed or in a place where it is not readily accessible (such as a trunk) or the driver is in violation.

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  • [–] 3 points 11 months ago*

    There have definitely been times when I was buying alcohol and carrying it in the front was most convenient, but I gave it a second thought. Definitely put it in back so it’s never a question

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  • [–] 13 points 11 months ago

    When someone said they don't drink:

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  • [–] 13 points 11 months ago (4 children)

    I hope this is the beginning of a new Sovereign Citizen style movement that uses hyper-literal misinterpretations of the law as a defense.

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  • [–] 9 points 11 months ago (2 children)

    I feel like the law is not drunk driving but something more like "operating a motor vehicle with a blood alcohol level above something something..."

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  • [–] 12 points 11 months ago (4 children)

    Yeah, the magic word in the law isn't "driving." It's "while intoxicated." You don't suddenly stop being drunk when you put your beer away. Human physiology doesn't work that way.

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  • [–] 7 points 11 months ago

    Listen up liberal MADD atheists! If you tell us to not drink and drive, then don't make shit up, when we drink when not driving. This is just like the IRS going after criminal fraudulent conservative religious groups. It's a witch hunt!!!!

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    [–] 10 points 11 months ago

    This is how little kids argue. lol

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  • [–] 10 points 11 months ago (1 child)

    Wait, her argument is it's the act of drinking (actually passing the liquid into your mouth) that's illegal?

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  • [–] 5 points 11 months ago*

    i guess she's going by the "don't drink and drive" rule, a little too literally. but the law obviously doesn't say that; it says under influence/while intoxicated, so even on a technicality she doesn't pass.

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  • [–] 7 points 11 months ago* (1 child)

    I'm not driving, I'm traveling! 😁

    (I used to hate SovCits, but honestly tho, now Americans need more "SovCits" more than ever, there's not enough resistance. I kinda sympathize with them now, they're just a little confused, but got the spirit. Where all the "anti-tyranny" people at? 🤔)

    (Edit: And yes I see the article is from 2024)

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    [–] 7 points 11 months ago (8 children)

    making fun of people's mugshots is conservative slop

    imagine finding it fun to humiliate people you've captured with your unlimited monopoly on state violence, seems pretty fash cucked to me

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  • [–] 4 points 11 months ago (2 children)

    Everyone knows the rules of Kario Mart.

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  • [–] 3 points 11 months ago (1 child)

    When I was like 4 I went nuts on my mom for drinking and driving. Nevermind that it was a diet coke...

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