350
Superman Toe Nails (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 day ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[-] [email protected] 41 points 1 day ago

The Pro had a funnier take on the same basic idea:

the pro

[-] [email protected] 20 points 1 day ago

Both comic artists have some misapprehension about how solidly a plane's wings are attached.... maybe they're Boeings.

Another thing is that if you get past the initial ka-pow! moment, the real issue would be how super are those swimmers? They might work like heat seeking missiles.

[-] [email protected] 8 points 23 hours ago

Been a while since I read it, but Larry Niven had a whole essay on this subject:

https://larryniven.net/?q=man-of-steel-woman-of-kleenex-by-larry-niven

[-] [email protected] 13 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Hancock (2008) had a similar bit, with the titular character blowing a few holes in his roof during a one-night-stand.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago

I've read for years about this scene being written, but not included. Imagine my surprise when I found out that it was not only filmed, but made easily available online!

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago

I swear I read a thought experiment on this topic decades ago in a Penthouse or Playboy.

[-] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago
[-] [email protected] 0 points 1 day ago

People who have aex are trash and should burn in hell

[-] [email protected] 53 points 1 day ago

Fake he lasers off his toe nails. You think any earth metal could cut Superman's nails? Gafaw

[-] [email protected] 29 points 1 day ago

I think there was a comic where kryptonite based grooming tools were shown.

[-] [email protected] 15 points 1 day ago

Lolz I was just guessing and being a dork. I guess that's interesting though.

[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

No, 99% of the time, it's laser vision. But kryptonite did show up once or twice.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago

probably a little blue kryptonite, the blue turns off his powers, the green one makes him sick.

[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

We just don't talk about the red one and it's tingling effect.

[-] [email protected] 2 points 23 hours ago

I thought it was pink kryptonite that we don't talk about.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago

I distinctly remember some rendition of Superman where they showed him "shaving" by reflecting his laser/heat vision off of a mirror.

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago

You think he does this for his asshole hair?

[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

What did superman's hair do to you?

[-] [email protected] 11 points 1 day ago

Damn, is that some kryptonite toe clipper?

[-] [email protected] 15 points 1 day ago

This is an artists rendition of me cutting my toe nails.

I literally need two hands and it shoots off like a bullet.

I close my eyes now because once I got hit in the face with the ricochet.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago

Have you tried using pedicure scissors rather than nail clippers?

[-] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago

Yes, they do work better

[-] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago
[-] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago

It seems not even superman can escape toenail fungus

[-] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago

Alright, I'll be the pedantic dick commenter and say: if Superman had toenail clippers capable of cutting through his nails, they wouldn't shoot off at insane speeds. Either the material of the clippers would just be crushed in his grasp, or they're made of some fantastical material that can withstand the forces needed and can cut them. There's no scenario where the trimmings shoot off like this

[-] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago

Disagree. Yes, normal clippers would just bend and break but let's say the clippers are from Krypton (maybe some basic accessories were in the space pod he was send it or whatever) and can in fact cut his toenails. When a normal human cuts his toenails those will sometimes shoot off and fly a meter or two. The joke is that for forces involved in cutting Superman's toenails are so big that the clipping would take down an airplane. I think the "shoot off with huge energy" part is in fact possible. I don't think that a tiny piece of really dense matter traveling at huge velocity would cause this kind of damage though. It would be more like a bullet, passing straight through and leaving a tiny hole behind. Or exploding and leaving a crater if the thing it hits is also really dense I guess.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)
[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

Harley seems to have a boner while doing that.

[-] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

Well she is using a chainsaw. That always gets het riled up.

[-] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago

if Superman had toenail clippers capable of cutting through his nails, they wouldn’t shoot off at insane speeds.

One word: TEC

[-] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)
[-] [email protected] 0 points 1 day ago

I rate it 3/5. If it had some twintowers the score would double

this post was submitted on 12 Aug 2025
350 points (96.3% liked)

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