Honestly, I'd prefer leisurely delivery unless next-day is absolutely necessary (and it should cost extra). Biggest problem is overpromising, just say it'll take 3-4 days and people will be happy it arrives in 2. It'll give the delivery workers a break, and you probably don't need it by tomorrow anyways otherwise you should've ordered sooner.

Part of the problem is the lack of stores nearby in case you do need something right away of course. Ideally you could solve that with a quick corner store visit instead of having to order online.

Basically Amazon didn't just fuck up retail, but postal too.

Also I think they made an (un)intentional Top Gear meme.

When the door is open, I think it will read: "The 'P' Stands."

...ing in bottles while driving.

(There are even reports of shitting into plastic bags)

Looks legit and awesome.

In the bike lane*

No, it stands for the bottles the workers have to hide, and probably throw in your street.

isn't that also where USPS parks?

Ohhh ho, in the middle of

You don't want to be with someone that clingy and desperate. You should break up with Prime. Don't lead them on.

It all reads like AI trying to be funny and quirky when in reality it just comes across as dumb, unintelligent and pathetically stupid.