710
Definitions (slrpnk.net)
submitted 1 week ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[-] [email protected] 142 points 1 week ago

It specifically says for thrusting or striking. That's where the pizza cutter fails to pass as a sword. 😔

[-] [email protected] 50 points 1 week ago

IDK maybe they're just really bad at cutting pizza.

[-] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago

No fucking way dude, that's slashing damage.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

Also if the pizza is really hot, it does burn damage to the roof of your mouth.

[-] [email protected] 27 points 1 week ago

You put the sharp edge on a surface and push forward to cut pizza. That IS thrusting.

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[-] [email protected] 17 points 1 week ago

Thrusting or striking, you can definitely strike with a pizza sword so it match at least one definition.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago
[-] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

How can one sheath the unsheathable

[-] [email protected] 78 points 1 week ago
[-] [email protected] 16 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

ah yes, ignoring that it should actuality be a polygon, implying a closed shape with straight sides much like this ignores the "weapon" and "used for thrusting or striking" parts of the definition.

not hard to make strange things fit a definition when you just ignore parts of it.

[-] [email protected] 20 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

something tells me neither of these are genuine attempts at properly using the definitions but rather clever subversions with deliberately obtuse interpretations in pursuit of... checks notes... humor.

[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

Relax, take a deep breath<3

[-] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago

No. You can't just put little boxes in the corner and call them right angles THERE ARE RULES WE LIVE IN A SOCIETY

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[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

This image makes me angrier than it should. Those 4 "right angle" designations are all lies. You cannot have a curved line attached to anything and call it a "right angle". It's not. Like, factually. I don't care if it's 2 feet long, or 200,000 miles, it will never be exactly 90°, which invalidates the entire thing.

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

OK. Walk in a straight line for a couple of metres and stop. Rotate left or right by exactly 90°. Now take a curved path in any direction.

Did you or did you not turn 90°?

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[-] [email protected] 37 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

A weapon ❌

Used for thrusting and striking ❌

[-] [email protected] 12 points 1 week ago

Long metal blade ❌

[-] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago

Tell that to pro wrestler, Nick Gage!

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

I see you've never been penetrated by a pizza slicer

[-] [email protected] 32 points 1 week ago
[-] [email protected] 22 points 1 week ago
[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

I was going to ask which squenix protag this was, but your alt text answered that for me.

Why do they all have a certain look to them?

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

If it rains, their socks are pure funnels to get water into the boots

[-] [email protected] 21 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

If Leonardo can use katanas to slice pizza, then I can use this (while pretending to be a turtle)

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[-] [email protected] 16 points 1 week ago

A sword by definition has a "pointed blade" accordingly any object with an infinitely long blade cannot be a sword. Rather, it's a blade ray.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

it does have a point. look at the blade from the side.

pointy bit goes into the pizza.

[-] [email protected] 8 points 1 week ago

Instructions unclear, pizza cutter stuck in pants and now I am circumferenced

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[-] [email protected] 13 points 1 week ago

Im not sure what defines a strike but im pretty sure you wouldnt thrust a pizza cutter. If we're being technical, it doesnt meet the whole definition.

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

I have used it this way to cut through some really crusty pizza.

strikes are possible.

[-] [email protected] 13 points 1 week ago

Well it's not infinitely long. It's pi D's long. With D being.. well, let's just say my "peanits"

[-] [email protected] 12 points 1 week ago

That blade is not infinitely long unless you measure the same part over and over again.

[-] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

Fr, what happened to 2πr?

[-] [email protected] 11 points 1 week ago

I heard a comedian call these "infinity knives" a few years back, and now it's all I can call them.

[-] [email protected] 11 points 1 week ago

No that's a pretty finite length, even if you have to measure the atoms to do it.

[-] [email protected] 1 points 5 days ago

Wait. Of the blade or the whole thing?

[-] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

You don't need to leave the kitchen, just need a pi

[-] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

It’s also not length but circumference.

[-] [email protected] 8 points 1 week ago

Diogenes ahh post.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

I would totally forge a sword in Skyrim with the shortest blade possible (a nub) and name it “Pizza Cutter.”

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[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

walking around in Dark Souls 4

Find a giant pizza cutter

[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

I don't know if this is a joke or not. Elden Ring has Ghiza's Wheel as a weapon and is low-key considered "Dark Souls 4" by many fans.

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[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

That's not infinitely long, it's infinitesimally long.

[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

Why not? Honestly i kind of sick with fantasy only using double edged European longsword and Japanese katana.

Give something weirder dammit, like Chinese hook sword and indian katar.

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[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

Diogenes has entered the chat

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

Have you guys ever received a pizza cut into 9 slices? I have, and I just want to know why, and more importantly how.

[-] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

I asked the pizza place to divide the pizza into 0 equal slices and about 20 minutes later there was a loud explosion from downtown. Never did get that pizza.

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[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

Yo. New Diogenes just dropped.

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

I have used a pizza cutter to cut more than one pizza. I have also wielded a sword, (Ren Fair and fought a dual), and cut pizza with it. I have also field dressed a couple of deer and cut a few pizzas, (along with apples and sandwiches) with a Victorinox Classic keychain pocket knife over the years.

Of the 3 pieces of cutlery, I find the Victorinox Classic to be the most useful.

[-] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

Best weapon in Lies of P.

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this post was submitted on 31 May 2025
710 points (96.5% liked)

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