Just remember: Tesla vehicles are surveillance machines, and the cops have access to facial recognition software, so I will not be surprised if whoever did this is caught.

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[–] 103 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Probably a faulty battery. Seems to be happening a lot lately. Sounds like Tesla should pull these off the market.

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  • [–] 66 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (7 children)

    The cops' facial recognition tech: palantir.

    Peter thiel's most wide spread project. Peter thiel, the man who funded JD Vance. Peter thiel, the man who became a billionaire with (f)Elon at PayPal. Thiel, the man who decides who is invited to and what subjects are discussed at the bilderberg meetings.

    Peter thiel is the most dangerous person nobody talks about.

    Also, balaclavas and ski masks, my friends. And walk differently from your normal walk. Gait detection is also a thing.

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    [–] 57 points 2 years ago (5 children)

    In positive news... I think the iridescence caused by the flame really makes that back panel look pretty. Overall an improvement on looks.

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  • [–] 34 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    When the cops ask if you saw who did it :

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    [–] 34 points 2 years ago

    So every cyber truck catastrophic failure is now an act of vandalism? Didn't we know these things caught fire randomly and spontaneously from their history? How far will weak business leaders go to prop up their crappy public parasitizing products?!

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  • [+] 33 points 2 years ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 child)
  • [–] 33 points 2 years ago (4 children)

    Back in the early days of Tesla when they still had the only cool car they ever made, the roadster, they were so proud of their near fireproof battery with lots of smaller cells. I never heard about a Roadster fire, and the first few model Ss were the safest cars on the road. I guess Elon's "fire everyone and save money" strategy took a few years to show through.

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  • [–] 29 points 2 years ago (3 children)

    Jet fuel can't melt steel beams but a car fire can warp a cybertruck apparently

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  • [–] 24 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    Well, you see, that's because a material doesn't need to be at melting point to lose its structural integrity.

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  • [–] 11 points 2 years ago* (1 child)

    Just to expand on this (entirely correct statement) for anyone curious about it, what specifically happened with the Twin Towers was this:

    Each floor was made of a layer of concrete, resting on a steel frame. The frame was comprised of horizontal I-beams which were pinned to the outer walls at each end with L-brackets.

    When the fire heated the beams, they softened ever so slightly. Just enough to make them sag a little under the weight. This, in turn, changed the angle at which the beams met the L-brackets, so now instead of all the force going straight down, some of the force was pulling the bracket away from the wall. The brackets, and the bolts that held them, weren't designed for this kind of stress, so they failed. As soon as I've bracket failed, that increased the proportion of the load being carried by the brackets around it, so they failed too (this is called a cascade failure). Once this happened on one floor, all that concrete fell down, smashing through the floor below it, and so on, in an even more extreme example of cascade failure.

    So yeah, jet fuel can't melt steel beams, but it can expose design flaws.

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  • [–] 18 points 2 years ago (2 children)
  • [–] 16 points 2 years ago*

    what do you call 4 cybertrucks on fire?

    • a good start

    • a garbage fire

    • a clustertruck

    • a mystery as to whether they just burst into flames on their own tesla style

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  • [–] 15 points 2 years ago (4 children)

    to the facial recognition; you need a library of past videos/photos to compare it to. You're driver's license is not enough on it's own, and masks and such like, even 'disruptive' make up can render it useless.

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  • [–] 7 points 2 years ago

    Be careful, it is getting better. I've found my own face on the Internet with just a single (unobscured) image upload. And that included finding faces in a different orientation. Masks probably still defeat it, but it's not as data intensive as it once was.

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    [–] 14 points 2 years ago (7 children)
  • [–] 5 points 2 years ago (3 children)

    That's really stretching the word innocent.

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  • [–] 22 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    Am i blind? I don't see "innocent" anywhere...

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  • [–] 8 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    I am blind - my mind converted Honest to Innocent. My point still stands - it's hardly an honest profession not at all like piracy.

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  • [–] 12 points 2 years ago

    Just for reference, while it has been edited, the comic is by Stan Kelly, The Onion's resident cartoonist. Kelly is fictional, a satirical stereotype of a right-wing newspaper cartoonist. His signatures are over-labelling everything, gratuitous self-inserts, and framing the wealthy/other advantaged groups as morally upstanding patriots unfairly victimized by their inferiors. The latter is usually accompanied by them crying a single tear.

    All that to say, in the context of a Kelly comic, "Honest Tesla Salesman" is definitely meant ironically.

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  • [–] 14 points 2 years ago

    Didn't Elon Musk do this by releasing a shitty product that keeps exploding left and right? When four explode at the same lot, you know you've got a safety issue on your hands.

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  • [–] 12 points 2 years ago

    I find that being incinerated has made the one depicted in the article considerably prettier. At least it has both curves and some color now.

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  • [–] 9 points 2 years ago

    bad quality issues.

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  • [–] 7 points 2 years ago

    The funniest part about Teslas being on fire is that they just have to let them burn to the ground because the battery can’t be put out.

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  • [–] 6 points 2 years ago

    Warm weather is just starting. It's gonna be a fun summer!

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  • [–] 6 points 2 years ago

    Ok so I am in no way saying you should do this but there's 360 cams on them so wrap up warm and run away battery fires let off lots of nasty chems so make sure you don't stand near a burning one for very long.

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  • [–] 5 points 2 years ago

    Oh no! Anyway...

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