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[–] 219 points 2 years ago* (4 children)

Be Polish. Live at the crossroads of three major continental zones. Incorporates traditions from Arabic, Latin, and Nordic languages into a unique synthesis. Everybody hates it. Nobody wants to speak it.

Be English. Live at the ass end of nowhere, and become a haven for vagrants, dissidents, pirates, and exiles. Incorporate traditions from Latin, Germanic, and Frankish languages into a unique synthesis. Everyone hates it. Nobody wants to speak it. Become worlds most spoken language anyway.

Moral of the story. People will have to learn your shitty incoherent language if you build a big enough navy.

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  • [–] 43 points 2 years ago (4 children)
  • [–] 8 points 2 years ago

    How long until internet slang/lingo snowballs out of control and becomes an actual language? I mean, it's already constantly spawning words and a diverse enough environment.
    I notice sometime I lack an optimal word to describe a concept IRL that an internet term would fit perfectly but would be cringe or meaningless unless the listener was also terminally online. There's also stealing terms from other languages that catch on, but that don't work offline(IE. Zeitgeist, pantsdrunk, kawaii) that get spread around enough to be generally know, even if a bit odd.

    Yes, including brainrot. Especially brainrot. It's not all pleasant.

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  • [–] 23 points 2 years ago

    Be Lithuanian. Get culturally dominated by Poland. Refuse to speak Polish anyway. Refuse influence from any language. Remove loan words, replace them with newly made Baltic sounding ones. End up impossible to learn.

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    [–] 53 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    Hungarian and Finnish have entered the chat

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    [+] 37 points 2 years ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (15 children)
  • [–] 14 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    the alternative is to make the syntax become a hellish mess. Like Mandarin or English.

    Now hang on just a second. English is fine. You just have to memorize or correctly guess the etymology of whatever word it is you're trying to spell/pronounce in order to get ... oh, okay, I think I see the problem now.

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  • [–] 13 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    the alternative is to make the syntax become a hellish mess

    The alternative is Czech.

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  • [–] 19 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    A Polish colleague of mine once accidentally picked Czech in an online work training exercise and then spent the next 30 minutes giggling to himself. I asked him afterwards what was up "Czech sounds like baby talk"

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    [–] 27 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (4 children)

    Bezwzględny Grzegorz Brzęczyszczykiewicz wyruszył ze Szczebrzeszyna przez Szymankowszczyznę do Pszczyny. I choć nieraz zalewała go żółć, niepomny następstw znalazł ostatecznie szczęście w źdźble trawy.

    EDIT: copy/pasted from somewhere, this looks incredible to pronounce! The only polish word I know is kurwa, and Zubrowka.

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    [–] 24 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    I feel like we'd all be much more on board with this if Poland wasn't in the shadow of Hungary right next door looking like somebody's cat had a serious episode on top of a keyboard.

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  • [–] 23 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Have you ever seen transcribed Georgian?

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    [–] 23 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    We used to have a server at my university which a polish guy set up. It received the name brzeczyszczykiewich. We decided that the server was secure enough by name, so we only put a trivial password on it for remote connection.

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  • [–] 18 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    Are you sure it wasn't "brzeczyszczykiewicz" (difference in last two letters)? Otherwise it seems like a little typo, which, to be fair, would be a good idea to keep it safe from Polish people haha

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  • [–] 22 points 2 years ago* (2 children)

    Kinda weird to isolate Polish when Hungarian, Finnish and Basque are actually all their own distinct language families.

    Polish actually isn't in a distinct language family and shares a lot with other western Slavic languages like Czech, and Slavic languages in general.

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    [–] 21 points 2 years ago (8 children)

    I don't think you could get the speakers of all the European languages to agree on which one is normal.

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    [–] 20 points 2 years ago (1 child)
    [–] 16 points 2 years ago

    This is outrageous! I will call all users of our Polish instance "SZMER" to... OK, I might be getting your point.

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  • [–] 16 points 2 years ago (13 children)

    It's not spelling, it's the grammar and ortography that would make you want to peel your skin off.

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    [–] 12 points 2 years ago

    Took 2 years of Polish at University. I spent more time on that one class than all my other classes combined... And I went to school for Education.

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  • [–] 12 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Polish is a Slavic language written out using Latin letters.

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    [–] 12 points 2 years ago (6 children)

    Po twojej pysznej zupie

    Nie ruszam dupy z klopa

    Ta zupa była z mlekiem;

    Na mleko mam alergię

    Po twojej pysznej zupie

    Nie ruszam dupy z klopa

    Ta zupa była z mlekiem;

    Na mleko mam alergię

    ...

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    [–] 11 points 2 years ago (11 children)

    I wonder if we had ž etc like Czechs would it make it easier for foreigners to read

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    [+] 11 points 2 years ago (3 children)
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    [+] 10 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 child)
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    [–] 9 points 2 years ago* (1 child)

    Grzegorz Brzęczyszczykiewicz z Chrząszczyżewoszyce powiat Łękołody.

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