486

It was a love story after all (lemmy.world)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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[-] [email protected] 23 points 8 months ago

The elvish council spent centuries debating why Sauron would do this, but the truth was he was interested in the tax deductions and a detailed income splitting scheme that harvested losses from Dwarven commodity futures to offset Mordor’s growing volcano habit.

Smaug was only ever in the Lonely Mountain to fully calculate wealth Sauron had sheltered there.

[-] [email protected] 16 points 8 months ago

Does this mean Smaug was a tax auditor? No wonder nobody liked him.

[-] [email protected] 15 points 8 months ago

Most dragons are misunderstood. Do you know how long it takes to count a mountain of jewels and coins, with at least one jewel worth entire kingdoms hidden in the stack?

You can't estimate the value by weight, it's a heterogenous mixture. It must be meticulously counted in only the way a dragon can.

It's no wonder they attack anyone trying to steal from the horde they're working on.

[-] [email protected] 14 points 8 months ago

[-] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

Drag wants to bone the nerd dragon

[-] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

Good for you, drag. Good for you.

[-] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

Is the dragon actually slain and dying, or is it just a flesh wound?

[-] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Interesting take. Perhaps it is simply a ruse to try and trick a medieval society into industrialization and the supporting capitalist thought...

[-] [email protected] 21 points 8 months ago

and in the darkness.... Bind them... to the following terms and conditions regarding... well, you see, we've been trying to reach you regarding your auto coverage...

[-] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

I'm sorry Elrond and Lorien, the terms and conditions state you must resolve the war of elves through binding arbitration adjudicated by the Mouth of Sauron.

[-] [email protected] 15 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

What if we kissed under the Great Eye? 😳 Haha jk jk, unless... 🥺👉👈

[-] [email protected] 12 points 8 months ago

1 to Sauron, 3 to the elves, 7 to dwarves, 9 to humans.

3+7 = 9+1

Sauron shipped a himself and a bunch of humans with elves and dwarves.

[-] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago

[-] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

That guy was a real life doctor at one point.

[-] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

Yeah, and yet he's most known for showing his small dick in The Hangover. Hilarious.

[-] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago

Can't beat that +2AC. Shame about the 7 day limit, though.

[-] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago

Oops! All Gay

[-] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

Just two dudes getting married, nothing gay about that

https://youtu.be/RBzB1ARVTxg?si=ZfVC46gL9PiJHlDs

[-] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

They said “no homo” so it’s ok

[-] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago

Man, deciding where to spend the holidays is going to be a nightmare.

[-] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

Shipping intensifies

[-] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

No backsies!

[-] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

regarding your name :(

[-] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago

Look at their comment history. They're a troll.

[-] [email protected] -4 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

because I react negatively to things does not mean I'm a troll. grow the fuck up

[-] [email protected] 7 points 8 months ago

Picks a username designed to anger the community they're in

Says they're just a jerk when questioned on it

Idk bro, have you considered that trolls are also known for being ugly and mean?

[-] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

Nice try.

this post was submitted on 17 Oct 2024

486 points (98.6% liked)

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