this post was submitted on 18 Aug 2024
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

Rule 1: All posts must include links to the subject matter, and no identifying information should be redacted.

Rule 2: If your source is a reactionary website, please use archive.is instead of linking directly.

Rule 3: No sectarianism.

Rule 4: TERF/SWERFs Not Welcome

Rule 5: No ableism of any kind (that includes stuff like libt*rd)

Rule 6: Do not post fellow hexbears.

Rule 7: Do not individually target other instances' admins or moderators.

Rule 8: The subject of a post cannot be low hanging fruit, that is comments/posts made by a private person that have low amount of upvotes/likes/views. Comments/Posts made on other instances that are accessible from hexbear are an exception to this. Posts that do not meet this requirement can be posted to [email protected]

Rule 9: if you post ironic rage bait im going to make a personal visit to your house to make sure you never make this mistake again

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[–] [email protected] 62 points 4 weeks ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 51 points 4 weeks ago

Hate it when two bad bitches fight like this

[–] [email protected] 38 points 4 weeks ago (4 children)

TBH, accusing a Georgian of "Russian chauvinism" is galaxy brain.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 weeks ago

I love how both Lenin and Stalin called the other one a lib at least once. Some things are eternal.

[–] [email protected] 62 points 4 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 42 points 4 weeks ago

Ow my brain

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[–] [email protected] 50 points 4 weeks ago (2 children)

I swear to God conservapedia is an elaborate bit being done by Andy Kaufman.

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[–] [email protected] 48 points 4 weeks ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 30 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 17 points 4 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 24 points 4 weeks ago

You're on my list fedposting

[–] [email protected] 23 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

Don't worry, next time I'm drunk I'll probably add "hexbear.net" and get IP banned

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 4 weeks ago (2 children)

I think of you more as an infamous bit than a lib

[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 weeks ago

Beans Lettuce Tomato sandwich
beanistruss-the-planbruh-moment

[–] [email protected] 10 points 4 weeks ago

Potato potato

[–] [email protected] 44 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

This is fake because HUSSEIN isn't fully capitalized smh

[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 weeks ago

There's also no "Sheik" before the name of Stalin.

[–] [email protected] 44 points 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago) (1 children)

The way this list is structured is enough of a joke on its own

Richard Dawkins

Yeah, pretty much

John Wayne Gacy

Throwing in a serial killer to discredit them, I guess that makes sense

Barack Hussein Obama

We're totally not racist

Adolf Hitler

michael-laugh

[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago) (1 children)

Gacy was a registered democrat

It doesn’t mean much though since Bundy and Baumeister were republicans. I guess with Gacy is that he has connections to other serial killers and pedophiles who were part of a larger network, but not much tying political figures to it. Baumeister was very wealthy and a businessowner so he likely had some political connections.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

He was pretty politically active actually, locally in the democratic party. But I wouldn't say he is the only democrat who loves systematic mass murder

[–] [email protected] 11 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

But I wouldn't say he is the only democrat who loves systematic mass murder

:brandon:

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[–] [email protected] 39 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

the trusworthy encyclopedia

[–] [email protected] 26 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 4 weeks ago

She's practically Stalin by American standards

[–] [email protected] 39 points 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago) (1 children)

not pictured: every hexbear dot net user other than myself

[–] [email protected] 14 points 4 weeks ago

myself

excuse you, im the only leftist here

[–] [email protected] 38 points 4 weeks ago

I would call Hitler a fucking lib to his face.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 4 weeks ago (2 children)

There's no way this isn't a bit

[–] [email protected] 29 points 4 weeks ago

Many conservatives think Hitler and Mussolini was a communist/leftist.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 4 weeks ago

Trust me, it isn't.

"NO U!" is practically a staple argument of CHUDs.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 4 weeks ago

this is hilarious

[–] [email protected] 32 points 4 weeks ago

This unironically made me laugh the fuck out way too fucking loud.

Jesus Christ, I've never seen a Hexbear post that tickled me this much.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 4 weeks ago

they didnt need to do my boys stalin-bummed and mao-wtf like this

would definitely call Hitler a lib to his face though data-laughing

[–] [email protected] 23 points 4 weeks ago (4 children)

Started reading their take of the Battle of Stalingrad on there just now and they suggest that the reason the Russians won was because Stalin knew a secret Russian Orthodox way to invoke God

[–] [email protected] 14 points 4 weeks ago

Very powerful

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 weeks ago (2 children)

Conservapedia tryna make Stalin look even more badass stalin-pipe

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[–] [email protected] 21 points 4 weeks ago

I'd make an "Everyone I Don't Like Is A Liberal, A Bedtime Story" joke here, but Conservapedia likes i-am-adolf-hitler in polite company, or at the least, has critical support with criticism for him losing or not going far enough.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 4 weeks ago (2 children)

wait is pz myers mainstream famous? i thought he was just a blog and some conference talks outside of his day job

[–] [email protected] 16 points 4 weeks ago (2 children)

No.

These are VERY online evangelicals.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 weeks ago

Yeah. The creator is the son of Phyllis Schlafly so that explains many things.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 weeks ago

weird that rebecca watson isn't on there then

[–] [email protected] 10 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

PZ Myers was famous for a blogger. He was starting to get fairly well known, like getting thrown out of theaters showing creationist films even though he was with Richard Dawkins who went unrecognized. But especially when the "new atheist" movement went mask off with the open racism, misogyny, etc, and Myers refused to go along with it and sided with the smaller contingent that were actually pro-feminism (the sjw's) it quickly killed his rising fame. Fame which would have petered out anyway as atheism stopped being the hot internet topic. And that's also the thing to keep in mind here. Conservapedia was made and its creators were trying to become famous around the same time, when new atheism vs creationism was all the rage. Myers being on the list is just because that site is like a snapshot of what the internet gave a shit about at that time. It's a time capsule from when Myers was somewhat relevant in the discourse, when conservapedia was also attempting to become relevant.

Unlike some others on the list, Myers is most definitely a liberal though. One of the few genuinely well-meaning ones from what I could tell, one who I would like to think would be a communist if he put half as much thought into it as he does biology and atheism. For example, he loudly came down on the correct side of trans rights in every circumstance I can think of, and given his clout as a professional biologist, that was always refreshing to see. It's been a long time since I've read or even thought about him though.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

yeah i remember pharyngula. and then he did that freethoughtblogs thing for a while with a bunch of other radlb atheists.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 weeks ago

Yeah, it was always pharyngula, still is for all I know. It just moved from being hosted on scienceblogs to freethoughtblogs. Where all the queer and trans atheists migrated after the great sjw rift of "elevatorgate."

[–] [email protected] 14 points 4 weeks ago

This is my favorite part of conserveapedia

numerous attempts to derive E=mc² from first principles have failed.[3] Political pressure, however, has since made it impossible for anyone pursuing an academic career in science to even question the validity of this nonsensical equation. Simply put, E=mc² is liberal claptrap.

The formula asserts that the mass of an object, at constant energy, magically varies precisely in inverse proportion to the square of a change in the speed of light over time,[4] which violates conservation of mass and disagrees with commonsense.[5]

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago)

Running some science blog = approximate amount of infamy as literally stuffing children’s corpses into your crawl space very-smart

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 weeks ago

As Marxist ideology sees Christianity as an enemy, it is unofficially satanic.

-an actual quote from the Conservapedia page on Marx

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