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[โ€“] 151 points 2 years ago (2 children)

MORTIFIED. So thoroughly distressed he got his picture taken to be in the Mail.

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  • Absolutely DISPERAGED to find the therapy seems to be doing an alright job. Very unhappy with the service, he is telling everyone he "definitely doesn't recommend how amazingly effective it is, especially since there's not a kickback for referrals. He HATES it, everyone!

    He does not, in any way, still have a micro dork that gives him constant issues. No way, guys. No way.

    He just bought a Cybertruck, in fact. It's amazing. It's so great. His penis is fine, everyone. It's not inverted at all when he thinks people are judging his ability to perform. It's absolutely throbbing, everyone! It's all great. Go buy a Cybertruck!

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  • [โ€“] 83 points 2 years ago (17 children)

    There is nothing wrong with, and everything right about, small penises. The more we mock menโ€™s behavior and bodies, the more we ourselves create awful 4ร—4 behavior.

    All penises are good. Sometimes the people attached are awful.


    Alternatively, imagine saying this about another body part on another gender.

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  • [โ€“] 26 points 2 years ago (8 children)

    This is some small titty energy.

    ... It doesn't hit the same.

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  • [โ€“] 34 points 2 years ago (7 children)

    Girls with small titties don't overcompensate by buying land rovers

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  • [โ€“] 11 points 2 years ago (4 children)

    Does anyone with any particular body characteristic overcompensate by purchasing a land rover or it it just meant to mock them by associating them with something they, and the person making the association, perceive as negative?

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    [โ€“] 73 points 2 years ago (3 children)

    Dude really showed his face in the article

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    [โ€“] 55 points 2 years ago (11 children)
  • [โ€“] 48 points 2 years ago (6 children)

    Just call 0121-824-0432 and theyโ€™ll fix your twig and berries.

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  • [โ€“] 8 points 2 years ago* (2 children)
  • [+] 54 points 2 years ago (2 children)
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    [โ€“] 41 points 2 years ago (10 children)

    Iโ€™m always uncomfortable cuz ppl on the internet made me think this is body shaming

    Not b/c we care about the driver but other guys who are rockinโ€™ le petite weiners

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  • [โ€“] 52 points 2 years ago (9 children)

    This is the way I look at it. I don't care if someone is homosexual because honestly no one's sexuality is my business. However, I mercilessly mock the conservatives who keep getting caught fucking same sex partners because of the hypocrisy.

    There's nothing shameful about a small dick. Use what you've got, we've all got talents. There is something shameful about feeling so insecure about some aspect of yourself that you'll get a big ass vehicle that you'll never get full use out of because you refuse to address your insecurities. The small dick comments are just where we "meet them where they live".

    Hell, I've got a truck because I haul shit a couple of times a week. It's not my main mode of transportation but I do drive it. If I got one of these because someone saw my truck unloaded I'd laugh my ass off. But there are definitely people who feel the need to prove some shit and would clutch all their pearls over a piece of paper from a stranger.

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  • [โ€“] 35 points 2 years ago (5 children)

    I am non-binary and have a bit of ED because of hormone replacement therapy, so I decided to be proactive last month and I bought a 2016 Jeep Renegade Trailhawk with about 35k miles.

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  • [โ€“] 28 points 2 years ago (3 children)

    For maximum effect make sure it's pristine clean without a molecule of dirt. You should be the only person to ever be transported in it, never take any passengers, and you must park across at least two parking spaces, four if you can manage it.

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  • [โ€“] 6 points 2 years ago* (2 children)

    Solid advice. Will do.

    Srsly tho, bought it because I'm leaving DFW and moving up north and thought the 4WD might be better for the winter. I do plan on taking it out on some trails at some point to see what it can do, and I'll be installing a trailer hitch as well to help some comrades move piles of bricks. They're...uh...building a house.

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  • [โ€“] 29 points 2 years ago

    Also, a complimentary colonoscopy for the butt hurt.

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  • [โ€“] 20 points 2 years ago (4 children)

    I need to print up a bunch of cards saying, โ€œIf you fuck like you park youโ€™ll never get it in,โ€ for all the absurd parking jobs I see.

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    [โ€“] 19 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Never let them see you cry.

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    [โ€“] 18 points 2 years ago (10 children)

    Damn we need some of those out here

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    [โ€“] 15 points 2 years ago

    Niccceee....

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  • [โ€“] 11 points 2 years ago

    Wait, this isn't the onion?

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  • [โ€“] 11 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    Shit. That's so brilliant. I think I'll have to do this.

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  • [โ€“] 8 points 2 years ago

    Now, I just need to purchase a 4x4.

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  • [โ€“] 8 points 2 years ago (6 children)

    I have never seen a Land Rover being driven by a man. They're chick buses here.

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    [+] 8 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (5 children)
  • [โ€“] 20 points 2 years ago (4 children)

    Why would a lesbian need a penis enlargement

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