this post was submitted on 04 May 2024
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Programmer Humor

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[–] [email protected] 49 points 6 months ago (9 children)

Removed double quotes, added single quotes

[–] [email protected] 35 points 6 months ago (1 children)

someone later on -m "removed single quotes, added double quotes"

[–] [email protected] 19 points 6 months ago (1 children)

More commits == More money!!!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (5 children)

Real talk: I have worked at a company where an exec briefly had the bright idea to rank developers on number of commits made.

You can imagine how that turned out.

He wasn’t an exec for very long.

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[–] [email protected] 36 points 6 months ago (2 children)

"Update"

It was my dotfiles, ok?

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 6 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago (1 children)

My commit messages have gotten extremely lazy since I start squashing all my commits down to one. I just describe the PR on the first commit message and write nonsense in all the others.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I've been adding the commit shas + messages to the final description, if anyone wants to see my exploratory work.

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Tests: Add a few test files.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 6 months ago

I thought we lost you ... Jia Tan!

[–] [email protected] 27 points 6 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 18 points 6 months ago

God read my code and it made Him cry

[–] [email protected] 16 points 6 months ago (1 children)

"Changed consent banner text to reflect from legal, even though they are wrong"

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago

"circumvented GDPR despite calling out strong ethical objections, because legal & management are forcing me to"

[–] [email protected] 16 points 6 months ago (7 children)

Update coffee list and tex files.

...and yes we have our office coffee list in a git repo.

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago

"fix for real this time"

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago

"28496 - there, it's fucking fixed you twat waffle."

Ticketed bug bosses son found. Dude nagged his dad who nagged us until it got fixed. Boss doesn't review code. And for the sake of a half dozen coworkers, I hope he never does.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (4 children)

";"

Previous commit was some stupid easy fix I didn't even bother compiling. Well, I should have, because it was the first time in recent memory I committed some code with a missing semicolon...

Before anyone asks : no, we don't do reviews ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 months ago

"I'm sorry, guys."

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago

git commit -m "if this doesn't fix it I'm looking up availabilities at my nearest maccas"

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago

Hrfg7ygfrvvby

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago

wip: good luck you monday fuck hahahaha

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago

"My laptop died before I could push these"

Not a good commit name I know, but my laptop stopped booting and I just really needed to continue from my desktop.

It's a student project anyway.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago

Fix for vendor lies.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago

Converted more tests to use the correct handle.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago

French dead link?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago (1 children)

hoho

I had just figured out how to fix a bug that broke our in house reminder system. My smug ass put hoho as the commit message for figuring something out that the previous guy couldn't. Of course it came back to bite me in the ass THIS WEEK when the system broke again in a similar fashion, but I couldn't remember what I had done.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago (1 children)

A

Because who cares for commit messages to my private repo?

[–] [email protected] 23 points 6 months ago (2 children)

You when you mess something up and only figure it out later?

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Prevent subprocess from killing itself until finished.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)
At a PV node, do not cut off from any TT hit.

The SPRT result of this may be different than before thanks to LMR.

Bench: 5212899

hey, you did ask

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago

modified: index.html

Rip

[–] Vuraniute 6 points 6 months ago

init: add readme

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)

"render trans chunks after entities/sel box etc "

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago

Very progressive.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago

“Initial commit, come back later”

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago

Fuck it I quit

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago

chore: ensure it's God's divine intellect

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