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What are some ways you've generally handled know-it-all nerds? The kind that gatekeep the concept of being highly intelligent? They've taken advantage of me all my life because I'm unconfident. (hexbear.net)

submitted 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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CW sexual assault, physical assault Growing up, I've been repeatedly assaulted and harassed by know it all's. That's how upsettingly nerdy they were about gatekeeping the autonomy of thinking for myself. Because they wanted to violate the most intimate of boundaries, and not have me fight back. They wanted control and power over me in every way. To play pretend that they were all powerful and intelligent wizards.

I see a lot of communists on here saying things that might lead to them being stigmatized, and I want to be able to do that more. You guys shut down nerdiness. I've been conditioned to have controlling nerd voices in my head, and automatically let them convince me out of setting boundaries and speaking up for what I believe in. Now I'm my own controlling nerd, and I don't want to be. I want to walk the right path regardless of how stigmatized it may be.

How do you shut down nerds? Especially when their opinions are antihuman? If you don't care about piggypoopballs opinions, what are your reasons for not caring?

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 10 months ago (1 children)

One that i like to use when I'm clearly just being "talked at" is "nah, I'm done here. i don't owe you a debate" and then STICKING TO MY GUNS and exiting the situation

[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

I was taught by a friend that when someone behaves too manipulatively, you can just leave the room without a word.

There was a shitty person who treated us two very differently. I observed if you start off a relationship with someone extremely manipulative with the vanishing act, they'll respect you more and try less shit on you. I stuck around when shit got bad, and all that did was give the manipulator room to test how far they could take things out on me.