But your actions affect others, you being unwilling to properly gender a person means that others hate will reach them easier. Just because you aren't being affected doesn't mean you can't help things improve. And if you aren't willing to gender somebody properly, what did you think that made you before? It's simply hateful.

So if the CEO of the company you worked for introduced himself with male pronouns but you thought he looked feminine, you'd call him by female pronouns? Or if you got pulled over by a female officer but she looked masculine to you, you'd call her "Sir"? Yikes. It sounds to me like you just like having a shitty excuse to disrespect people.