Elon, aka Office of Personnel Management, aka S.H.I.T.H.E.A.D.:
We encourage you to find a job in the private sector as soon as you would like to do so. The way to greater American prosperity is encouraging people to move from lower productivity jobs in the public sector to higher productivity jobs in the private sector.
Damn dude, this is so awesome, I’ve literally never been tied to this fuck through even consumption and now I have him pulling on my chains, at the best possible time 
When I was in school I was looking at getting jobs with the Forest Service and the most common piece of advice I got was that it's all about personal connections. There's plenty of personal connections and patronage at even the innocuous agencies.