this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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[–] [email protected] 67 points 3 months ago (2 children)

My spouse was admitted to hospital for two weeks and had several geriatric roommates. The nurse asked one of them if she knew where she was, and she yelled "IN SATAN'S ASSHOLE".

[–] [email protected] 51 points 3 months ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 months ago (2 children)

That actually isn't even much of a stretch for Texas names. I live near the Devil's Backbone.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

So you live just north of Satan's asshole. Got it.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

I'll have to check it out!

I'm actually involved in the filming of a local horror movie that's going to be truly awful.

It's about mermaid monsters. I help coordinate some of the water work and act as the !production photographer and backup safety diver for the underwater scenes.

It's going to be really, really bad. But it's still fun!

(https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/6785e9f4-ba82-470d-879a-0f69588ede2e.jpeg)

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

Satan's asshole in Texas is called Dan Patrick.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

More specifically, Houston.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

Nurse here: we ask 'orientation' questions as part of our assessment

I had a younger patient going through the straights with hallucinations (newly diagnosed schizophrenia)... and I had been asking the same questions (as we do) a lot

So I asked them once again, "Do you know why you're in the hospital?". Their response: "Deez nuts!"

I always appreciate a good "Deez nuts" joke, but that one has been my favorite so far. The volition on their face and the shitty smirk; they're completely tied down with a guard because they would occasionally be violent... but hot damn, that was a zinger.

I counted their response as oriented— they know what they did lol

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

I like that so much! Deez nuts lol.