I've started messages and silicone strips for the only visible scar and these treatments have already had effect. Minoxidil for the transplanted hair and obviously it hasn't been long enough usage to have visible hair regrowth but it has slowed down shock loss.

Now that the swelling is down and my vision is back, I can look in the mirror and appreciate the results. And yeah. The struggle was worth it. I love the changes, looking into a mirror and seeing my face now is euphoria-inducing. I dunno think I'm kinda hot now too... I can't wait until the hair grows back and the healing process is fully complete. I'll be unstoppable

Okay anyway so I know I have ADHD for sure, like not only was it easy to self-diagnose but I got an official diagnosis from a psych so that's like all sorted.

Autism has been way harder to pin down. Like there are some criteria I resonate with like a lot, and there's some where it's the complete opposite. And maybe some a mix?

It doesn't help that ND people I've talked to about it have been 50/50 as well. "Yes you do" "Nah you don't" That's not helpful!

Someone said take the RAADS when you're not on meds or stimulants and then try it again when I'm on them. I thought it was silly but I took the test last night with no meds/stimulants and got a score right on the border, and then I took it again today after my meds kicked in and I got 10 points higher?

Chat does adderall cause autism

Ok but seriously I do understand that ADHD can mask autism criteria so it does make sense that I'd relate that in a mindset where my ADHD stuff is reduced that I'd be able to see more of what's underneath but... it's so much on the edge that I'm still confused. Do I just have like the la croix of autism?

Where's the comprehensive AuDHD test when I need it?

I am glad I ultimately figured it out even if it was not in the graceful way and I'm happy with myself and how far I've come even if it took me awhile. Though I can't help but wonder how things would be now if I had been stronger and braver and ready to cut ties sooner. If I had started HRT in my 20s (or through some miracle, my teens), would I feel better about myself if testosterone had less time to do its damage? Would I feel like less of an outlier and more connected if I was closer to the average age of the wider community when I started? How different would my life be now if only I could've found my way sooner and not worried so much about the opinions of others? Would I be spending less of my time writing all this self-absorbed sadsack shit online an hour after I should be asleep and more time touching grass? (probably not that last one)