Trans Jesus is canon β¨π³οΈββ§οΈ
this post was submitted on 17 Feb 2024
632 points (98.0% liked)
Atheist Memes
5549 readers
457 users here now
About
A community for the most based memes from atheists, agnostics, antitheists, and skeptics.
Rules
-
No Pro-Religious or Anti-Atheist Content.
-
No Unrelated Content. All posts must be memes related to the topic of atheism and/or religion.
-
No bigotry.
-
Attack ideas not people.
-
Spammers and trolls will be instantly banned no exceptions.
-
No False Reporting
-
NSFW posts must be marked as such.
Resources
International Suicide Hotlines
Non Religious Organizations
Freedom From Religion Foundation
Ex-theist Communities
Other Similar Communities
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
Wouldn't the Y chromosome come from God, and that's where Jesus inherited this magic from?
Although Mary just went straight to heaven without dying, so maybe she had some magic in her genes...
All I know is the earth is definitely older than the sun.
according to what i've heard when i was a kid, Mary birth was a miracle, her parents were to old or something and she was born without the original sin
Good ol' catholic origin stories.
Maybe Jesus was really bitten by a radioactive god?
Yeah, I believe she is the "immaculate conception"
Fun fact, i was born with an original cos
So... More credibility for raptor Jesus, I see
yeah well, still, fuck Ken ham.
Thing is... God's spunk is so mighty, it can get you pregnant through the back door, baby.
Wtf am I reading
Cold hard facts.
Something that'd give some creationists a massive brain hemorrhage
the end lmao
btw artificial insemination still keep the person "virgin"?, if so, god may have did that i guess lol
I'm very sorry, but the first thought that popped into my head is of Mary opening up, going "alright if you get it in this time it's 50 points!".
"He shoots he scores!"
I can't imagine they'd have turkey basters in those days.
A lot of fun is had among Catholic teens who get sloppy with their outercourse, and boyfriend's sperm navigates from the inner labia down through the canal and into the uterus.
Then the girl and her doctor get to have giggles over an intact corona and an actively progressing pregnancy.
So only people with turner syndrome should be pope. Got it.
growing up in that time with Turner syndrome would have made for a very empathetic individual, and could very well have been the lynch pin to her teachings.
Tina Turner can too, if she asks nicely.
What about Timmy Turner?
I feel like having fairy god parents would make pope duties a lot easier. Make his blessings a bit more potent.
Ok, him, Tina Turner and Detective Scott Turner of & Hooch fame, but no more! Under no circumstances must Ted Turner or anyone related to him be allowed to pope around.
Since she was supposedly human, the only X chromosomes theory is the most solid. Unless the holy ghost was not so ghost and had a more material way to make mary pregnant.
Is the space pope reptilian?
OMG! MARY WAS THE SERPENT IN THE TREE! IT SHOULD'VE BEEN MEEEEEEEE!
Man, it took me 20 minutes to understand this shit. Must be cuz I am no native speaker, not that I am just stupid
that last comment makes me lol. literally any distantly possible alternative to a character being queer.
Its apologetics 101. Start with the presupposition that the bible is correct, then find any way to make it not conflict with itself or with observations. Mary was a virgin, Jesus is male, only lizards can do that, the Bible doesnβt say she wasnβt a lizard, and yay we did an apologetics!