this post was submitted on 01 Jan 2024
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[–] [email protected] 69 points 10 months ago (4 children)

Call me whatever, I am feeling sad for him tbh :(

[–] [email protected] 36 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Hi, Whatever, I'm dad.

There was a duck at a local park that got shot by a "toy" crossbow and was walking around for a day or two slowly bleeding before someone took it to the local wildlife rescue.

I don't understand why some people just feel the need to do things like this.

Unless the gator popped up and surprised someone having a picnic, then I understand the stab, but I still feel bad it's just going around as a knife-based unicorn.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 10 months ago (2 children)

I saw a duck at a park once with an arrow (like, a hunting arrow rather than a toy) stuck in it. I tried to catch it to see if I could remove it; probably best that I couldn't since those barbed arrows do more damage coming out than going in. The duck really didn't seem bothered by it, but it was probably just trying to put on a good face.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago

It's never a good idea to pull out a stabbing object, for the reason you mentioned, and the parts inside might be stemming blood flow. Even if you cut the arrow to pull it through neatly it wouldn't make a difference unless you were at a vet clinic that specializes in birds.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago
[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Call me whatever

But I'm calling the alligator Knifey.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

"Who's throwing handles!?"

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago

Tried to think of something witty, but this just sucks.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago

it's just an average tuesday for him

[–] [email protected] 53 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Strange Alligators laying in ponds distributing knifes is no basis for a kingdom

[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago

Strange Alligator should be a Sade song.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago

Help! Help! I'm being oppressed!

[–] [email protected] 51 points 10 months ago (1 children)

“Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses! Not some farcical aquatic ceremony!”

[–] [email protected] 29 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Look, if I proclaimed myself emperor, just because some moistened croc threw a sword at me, they’d put me away!

[–] [email protected] 21 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Florida Republicans who have all the power: Help! I'm being repressed!

[–] [email protected] 14 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Come see the injustice inherent in the system!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago

Bloody peasant!

[–] [email protected] 37 points 10 months ago (2 children)

a lemmy post of a reddit post of a screengrab of a tweet.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago (1 children)

A big repost sandwich to start the year!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago

Amamamamam...

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Link aggregating site users perpetually surprised by aggregated links while feeling superior.

More news at 11.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 10 months ago
[–] [email protected] 23 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 20 points 10 months ago (1 children)

He will not fail to respond in our hour of need. It's your historical moment, @thekingoflorda@[email protected]!!!

[–] [email protected] 46 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Give me a sec, I’m riding a dolphin to Florida to complete this quest!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

You're not in Florida? Are you ruling King Richard-style?

[–] [email protected] 14 points 10 months ago (2 children)

The king part is more aspirational, that's why I need the sword.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago

Strange Alligators laying in ponds distributing knifes is no basis for a kingdom!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago

My liege! That is a rusty surplus store machete! Can you make do?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

I am here for this epic quest, future king!

[–] [email protected] 14 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Screw pulling it out. I want to know how it got there.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago

From the last person it ate...

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago

Florida Man.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago

Do you though?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago

GTA 6 easter egg incoming

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

It’s the light dragon. It’s Princess Zelda!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

We should choose political leaders by throwing them in a lake with an alligator that has a knife in its head in it instead of elections. The first candidate who retrieves the knife and survives is the winner.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

The terrible quality of this picture almost looks like a helicopter with some silhouetting